Crazy Days
by DeArPrUdEnCe03
Summary: Edward's aggressive behaviour and explosive personality brought him to Fork's mental institution. There, he meets Bella, a patient of five years suffering from a multiple personality disorder. AH, OOC.
1. Chapter 1

Edward's aggressive behaviour and explosive personality brought him to Forks' mental institution. There, he meets Bella, a patient of five years suffering from a multiple personality disorder. AH, OOC.

AU/OOC/AH

Special Thanks to my beta AcrosTheSkyInStars, if I didn't have her i would be lost!

Mature audience only! Sexual and destructive behaviour.

Edward's POV:

"Mr. Cullen, I hope you are aware how lucky you are. Not many people have relatives in high places that are able to pull strings to bring you here," the fat bastard said. I rolled my eyes. Everything about this man annoyed me already. He paused to glance down to the files arranged on his desk. "So you're here with us for seven months," he continued, "and if you play nice, you're free to go, but if we find you too unstable, your ass is mine."

His yellowing teeth were sickly as he smiled at me and I felt dirty being in this dingy office. It smelled heavily of decay, like it hadn't been cleaned in years.

"Now, since you're not considered a danger, at the moment, you are being placed on the second floor. You are not permitted to leave the area without an orderly assisting you. If you're a good little boy, then you'll get some days where you're allowed outdoor activities, and once a month, you'll be permitted off the grounds."

I rubbed the back of my neck, easing the ever growing tension that was becoming more prevalent thanks to this jackass sitting in front of me. His tone and demeanour were trying my patience. He was treating me like I was a four year-old with a mental disability.

I tried to recount the events that brought me to this hell, but everything seemed to blur together. The only thing that stood out was the trial. My father had gotten me out of it, used his money to pay some people off. So instead of rotting away in some fucking prison cell like a caged animal, I was stuck in this hellhole for a couple of months.

The fucking old bastard that was sitting in front of me, acting all high and mighty, seemed to enjoy trying to belittle me, but I just rolled my eyes and made sure to sigh extra loudly.

"Mr. Cullen, Mrs. Benson will show you around the area and provide you with more rules that you must follow. Now, if you get out of line or harm any of our fellow inmates, your punishment will be handled by me. Don't push me kid, cause I'm waiting for you to mess up and join the folks up on the third floor."

"Whatever," I huffed.

"Now, Mr. Cullen, you will call me by Mr. Reed." The fat bastard tried telling me off.

I got up from my seat and could feel the drugs they'd provided earlier starting to affect me. I followed Mrs. Benson out of the room with two other male attendees. The walk down the corridor made it seem all too real but I knew that I had to suck it up and behave for seven months, so I could get out of this shithole. I just prayed no son of a bitch would try to push me because I had too short a temper to deal with any of it.

"Mr. Cullen, due to your explosive behavioural problems, we're putting you on some medication to help control your issues. However, if you attempt to harm yourself or any other patients, we will have to put you on the third floor," Mrs. Benson said.

I rolled my eyes again.

_I get it. I fuck up; I'm on the third floor._

There's no need to repeat it eighty-six times.

Staring at Mrs. Benson, I noticed that she wasn't too bad to look at. Now, my standards for women were somewhat low; hell, give me a good set of female legs and I'll be fucking that in a second. But Mrs. Benson seemed too much of a tight ass for me. You know...the one that would only do the missionary position and always had to be on the bottom.

She swiped her key card and the white doors soon opened. I was a little shocked at how different it looked compared to the hallways. The walls were a dull yellow and the furniture was old, but at least it had somewhat of a personality.

Before I even took a step, a pair of arms wrapped themselves around my waist. The woman's face was pressed into my shoulder and her lips were on my neck. The scent of strawberries drove me crazy and all I wanted to do was stand there and sniff her hair. Unfortunately, one of the male attendees pulled her off me; taking away my small sliver of strawberry heaven. A sudden emptiness filled my arms because her body had been extremely warm.

"Bella, what on heaven sakes are you doing?" Mrs. Benson asked.

That's when I saw her; she was more beautiful than I could have imagined. Her skin looked almost porcelain and her doe eyes made her look so innocent. She started to bite on her lower lip, which made my groin tighten because I could still smell her.

She smiled and wiggled herself from the male attendees grasp. "Well, Mrs. Benson, I found him," Bella said, all giddy. Her voice was confident and raspy, despite how excited she sounded. I was completely entranced.

"Found whom?" Mrs. Benson asked.

She playfully shook her head, letting her lovely brown locks fall all over her shoulder.

"My vampire lover, Eric," Bella said so matter-of-factly.

I was a little taken aback. Eric?

Mrs. Benson had a small smirk on her face, "Oh so now you're Sookie today, Bella?"

Bella shook her head and grabbed my hand. Her grip was soft and delicate. "Who's Bella? I'm Sookie, remember? Eric is finally here to take me away."

Bella looked like she was about to hug me again, but the other attendee grabbed a hold of her before she had a chance to wrap herself around me.

"Jake, could you bring Sookie back to her room?"

Before Jake could escort Bella away, she slipped through his grasp and her lips were on mine. It was shocking and unexpected, but it wasn't unwelcome. I tried to kiss back, but she was pulled off to quickly for me to move.

"I'm sorry about that, Mr. Cullen. Bella's, well...she's Bella," Mrs. Benson apologized.

After that, we moved on. Mrs. Benson gave me a quick tour and went over some ground rules.

No smoking, drinking, or doing anything remotely enjoyable. I was surprised we were allowed to fucking breathe on our own without them knowing about it.

I barely spoke two words to her and was lead straight to my room to unpack and get adjusted. I felt relieved that I at least got my own room. Thanks, pops.

After I was medicated again, I was soon staring up at the ceiling, unable to really think or move. The sun had set a long time ago and I was definitely mellowing out. My eyelids would flutter and my head would nod, but I wouldn't fall asleep. It was like my mind was refusing, even though it was as dark as it could get.

The creaking of my door woke me up from my zombie-like state of mind. I shifted and leant up against the wall to get a better look at who was intruding. The shadowy figure soon grew bigger and closer, as whoever it was approached my bed. I was about to shout for some assistance, but an oddly familiar presence consumed me as a small, warm hand covered my mouth.

"Shh, I just wanted to apologize for earlier," the sweet voice of Bella said. She crawled onto the bed, into the moonlight, and I saw her beautiful face and her small body. "I'm going to remove my hand, so please don't scream."

I just nodded. When her delicate hand was no longer on my mouth, I whispered, "What are you doing here?"

She settled in next to me, while I sat up and placed my back against the headboard. She moved the hair from her face to behind her ear, and I watched as she bit on her lower lip that was plump and soft pink in the moonlight.

She took a deep breath and said, "I'm sorry for attacking you earlier. I wasn't really myself." She forced a small smile on her lips. I could tell she wanted to say more, but she kept quiet.

I wasn't really sure why I did it, but for some reason, my hand moved, like it was detached from my body. My fingers lightly trailed the skin of Bella's wrist, skipping up her arm as her eyes followed my movements. My hand ended up cupping her cheek and I turned her head to meet my gaze.

"I don't mind," I said quietly, "Sookie, is it?"

She rolled her eyes and playfully nudged my shoulder, causing my hand to drop to my side.

"Shut up, I have no control over my other halves," she remarked with a small chuckle. It was so weird, how she seemed to be okay with being openly crazy. But then again, I guess it wasn't so weird. I _was _in a mental institution.

"So who are you?" I asked, looking deep into her eyes.

She smiled now, small and perfect. "I'm Bella," she introduced, extending her hand, waiting for me to take it.

I shook my head and laughed. "Edward," I replied, taking her hand into my own.

"I can see this being the start of a beautiful friendship," Bella said as she released me. I smiled. I was so mesmerized by this woman. Despite the crazy she seemed to display, she seemed so innocent...so pure.

"Only friendship?" I asked, unable to help myself as I leaned in more, pressing my lips close to her ear. "I thought maybe we could try something else out."

I was trying to contain myself, but I could smell her hair, the strawberries, and I couldn't stop my inappropriate gestures.

I was actually shocked that she wasn't disgusted or even taken aback by my comment. She simply smirked, and lifted herself off the bed. The empty feeling came back because her warmth was comforting.

"Yeah, you see, I have a thing against dating crazy people," she said with a grin.

I smirked. "Well that's good, cause I'm not crazy," I said with a matter-of-fact tone to my voice.

She walked towards the door, but before leaving, she turned her head, "You know, only crazy people say they're not crazy. You just proved my point. "

I opened my mouth to speak, but she walked out before I could formulate a response. She left me stunned. I lay back down on the bed, smiling to myself as I thought of her. She was the last thing in my mind before the drugs finally kicked in and helped me to fall asleep.

"Wake up, Cullen. You need to take your medication and your routine therapy session starts in a half an hour," Jake said loudly, rousing me from my sleep.

I sat up, scratching the back of my head, wondering if last night had been a dream. Had Bella really been here?

"Give me a minute, I need to take a piss," I said, my voice hoarse.

He mumbled something under his breath as I got up. After taking a quick piss, I washed my face and tried to tame my crazy hair.

I could still see dark circles beneath my eyes and how sickly thin my face was. I was still no more than skin and bones, but I was starting to heal. My arms were getting some shape back into them and my movements no longer felt laboured. But I knew I still had a ways to go. I needed to exercise...

"_Come on baby, I need another fix," Tanya said. I felt her grinding on top of me, twisting her lithe body. As much as I was aroused, I felt no urge to fuck _her _at the moment. I could barely focus on her and what she was doing. All I felt was the sharp, shooting pain in my arm. _

_I rolled over, causing Tanya to fall onto my other side. I rubbed the heels of my palms over my eyes, trying to zero in on my surroundings because everything was blurry. I sighed. Go figure, Tanya and I, again, doing heroine in her penthouse apartment. _

_I pulled the leather belt from around my bicep and felt the raw buzz surrounding the inside of my skin. The growing tension in my veins was becoming more prominent the more I lay there, motionless._

"_Come on baby, just one more," she grovelled as she crawled closer to me._

_Despite how shitty I felt, I had to laugh at myself. I turned the once famous, international runway model into a drug-obsessed whore. I mean, I had a bad habit, but that was due to the fact that it controlled my anger. She, on the other hand, did it just to be skinnier. How much smaller could she get when she was barely a toothpick? _

"_Fuck off T," I muttered. _

"_Don't tell me to fuck off," she whined, "just because daddy dearest is some important CEO doesn't mean shit, Edward. You're a poor excuse for a man, crying about how life is so hard. Get over yourself. And another thing…" _

_I didn't want to hear anymore, so I got up and left. Funny, how one moment could affect the rest of your life. _

The call of my name brought me out of my thoughts. I grabbed a clean uniform and quickly changed, brushing my teeth and then doing one last check before I left the bathroom.

"Took you long enough; I expected this more from a woman than you," Jake said.

I just ignored his sarcastic comment and followed him to the front. He pointed to the short line in the corner of the room, which I assumed is where they discharged the drugs. I walked to the back of the line and looked around the room for Bella, or whichever personality was present at the moment.

"You look so familiar," a soft, almost childlike, voice said.

I turned around and saw a small, dainty woman. She looked no more than eighteen, but her petite body and short, bobbed haircut made her seem even younger.

"Excuse me?" I asked in confusion. My tone had been harsher than I'd intended and I frowned at how much of a dick I'd sounded like.

Despite my asshole behaviour, she gave me a huge smile and looked overly excited for no apparent reason.

"You're finally here, Thank God!" she squealed. I just blinked at her, a little taken aback at how creepy that sounded. How in the hell would she have known I'd be coming here?

"What?"

"You're finally here, for Bella," she clarified. Okay, now that creeped me out even more.

"What are you talking about?" My voice was close to cracking. "What does this have to do with Bella?"

She shook her head like this was some sort of game and I could feel my blood starting to boil. I hated being the last to understand something.

"You two belong together. I can see it now," she said with a sure nod of her head.

My eyes went wide, but then I realized...I'm in a mental institution. Why was I taking her seriously?

"Okay, since you're so sure of this, what do you think is going to happen next in that crystal ball of yours?" I asked sarcastically.

"Why should I tell you? It would be a lot more fun watching you trying to figure that out for yourself."

I shook my head. I could only take so many cryptic riddles before I lost it completely. I could feel my muscles tighten as I curled my hand into a fist, when I felt a firm grip on my shoulder. I was getting worked up for some reason, and just as I was about to turn around to tell the bastard to get his fucking hand off me, that soft, sweet voice cut through all my anger.

"Jazzy, Alice, what are you guys doing?"

I turned around, finding that the hand on my shoulder belonged to a tall, lanky man with blond hair. But my attention wasn't on him. It was on Bella, who was at his side. She looked absolutely beautiful, you know, even though she had on a large robe and her hair was up in a messy, loose bun.

Her beauty was natural.

"Bella, I was trying to calm him down," the blond man said quietly to her.

Bella grabbed his hand and pulled him aside, stepping up on her tiptoes to whisper something into his ear. He nodded in response to what she had said, going over to Alice and taking her hand before walking away.

"Sorry about them. They might come off strong, but they both have good hearts," she said, taking a spot in line.

"Yea, yea," I muttered to myself.

She rubbed my shoulder softly, kneading the tense muscle a little bit harder as my eyes fluttered closed. I had to take deep breaths to calm myself, to prevent me from doing something drastic...like jumping Bella. I felt my dick growing hard as her strawberry scent, coupled with her gentle touch, drove me to madness. My heart was in overdrive, pounding for her as I tried to stand as still as possible.

"You always look so angry," she whispered, keeping her voice low. My eyes flew open and I turned my head. I would have responded, but Bella kept going, "You're next." She pointed in front of me and I sighed, taking a step up to the counter, where a fat, old nurse was perched on her stool.

"Mr. Cullen," she said in a bored voice, holding a clipboard in one hand and a small container of pills in the other.

I pointed to the multicoloured pills, "What the hell are those?"

She huffed and narrowed her eyes at the charts on her clipboard. "Mostly sedatives and lithium," she responded, holding the pills out, expecting for me to actually put all that shit in my body.

Fuck that. When the hell did I agree to take all this?

"I'm not taking that shit," I said, my voice growing louder with each word as I took a few steps back. I turned slightly and found that Bella had retreated as well and was watching me with a furrowed brow.

I faced the nurse once more and she rolled her eyes, "Mr. Cullen, either you take these pills quietly and step aside, or I will get an orderly to assist you; your choice."

My anger was rising and my face was hot as she shoved the pills closer to me. I couldn't help it, I snapped. I flicked the pills out of her hand and growled out a "fuck you!"

I could barely take a breath before a bearish creature captured me in his arms.

"Mr. Lutz, could you please escort Mr. Cullen back to his room and make sure he takes the necessary medication?" the fat nurse asked.

"This is bullshit," I muttered. I struggled against the orderly's grasp, but damn, the motherfucker was _strong. _I couldn't move more than an inch. I tried to kick him, but failed miserably.

"Calm down," the tall, beastly orderly kept repeating.

I didn't dare look at Bella as the orderly escorted me away, back to my room. I kept trying to wriggle free, but he had a death grip on me. There was no way I could have escaped.

When I was in my room, Jake came in, and he and the larger one, the one who'd been restraining me, tied me to my bed. I lay there, defeated, sighing at how I was fucking _tied _to my bed right now. It was ridiculous.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a third man enter the room. He was much other than the two orderlies with a shock of bright blond hair and a clean, crisp lab coat.

"Thank you, Jake, Emmett," he said with a nod to the orderlies, "I can take it from here."

"You sure?" Emmett asked.

The older man gave him a warm smile and nodded his head. I tried to pull my hands and legs from their restraints, but it was useless. My limbs hurt from tugging and my neck hurt from straining it to look at him. I dropped my head back down to my pillow as he came to my side and placed his small, black bag on the nightstand.

He opened it up, pulling out a fairly large needle, placing it down on the table.

"Mr, Cullen, my name is Carlisle; I will be your physician," he said calmly. For some strange reason, his voice relaxed me. I was still angry that I was strapped to my bed, but I was as calm as he sounded.

"Now, looking at your charts," he scanned the clipboard, "I see you've been diagnosed with an extreme bipolar disorder."

I think he paused to wait for me to respond, but I kept my mouth shut.

"I know it's your first week here," he continued, "and it can be especially hard for those patients whose tempers flare easily, but I need to ask for your cooperation."

I angled my head, waiting for him to go on.

"I'm aware of your situation, and even though your stay with us will be relatively short, I believe you need to be on your best behaviour. I can't say I can imagine what's going on in your head, and that's not why I'm here. I'm just here to make sure you're physically healthy," he said with a genuine smile. I smiled weakly in return before he said, "Looking at your past history, I see that you were addicted to heroin, is that right?"

He waited for a response again, but I just stared up at him. He gave me a small smile and nodded.

"And you were sent to rehab earlier for that addiction?"

I didn't respond.

"It also shows on your report that you relapsed before the time of the accident, so I assume it's safe to say you are still going through withdrawals."

He then took a longer pause, waiting for me to fill in the blanks for him, but I didn't.

"Ok, Mr. Cullen, can I call you Edward?"

My voice finally caught up to me and I softly said, "Edward."

It was strange, how this doctor took such pride in me saying my own name.

"See Edward, I'm not here to hurt you in any way. Now, you're about to miss your first therapy session with my lovely wife, who is waiting for you. Wouldn't you rather be out there, than tied to this bed?"

I nodded.

"I think you're a good kid, Edward, who has just fallen on hard times," Carlisle commented as he set his clipboard down on the table, next to his bag. "We're not the enemies here. We're not trying to get you locked up for good. We're simply trying to get you back on the right path, and it's hard to do that with you shouting obscenities or tied to your bed. If you promise to keep your anger in check, I can promise you receive the best care, and a possible early release."

I thought about it for a second. I knew he was probably lying, but I wanted to get the hell out of the fucking bed, so I just nodded.

"Excellent. Let me bring back Emmett to untie you and walk you to therapy."

With that, he got off his chair and grabbed the needle, placed it back in bag, and snapped it shut.

I groaned...this was going to be a very long seven months.

Bella's POV:

My head was buzzing from last night. I tried to go over in my head what had happened but felt as the numbness took over instead. I know I went to Edward's room to apologize, but before that, nothing came to mind.

Edward. No one can describe the undeniable pull I felt when I was around him. It was as if I had been living in the darkness for so many years, that I never realized how much I had missed the light.

"What are you smiling about?" Alice asked.

I turned my head slightly and saw Alice sitting on her bed, swinging her legs back and forth as she looked at me.

"Nothing," I answered nonchalantly.

She leaped off her bed and pranced over to mine. I shifted a bit so she could have more room and she lay down next to me.

"You're such a liar," she said as she tucked her arms beneath her head, "I can see it in your eyes...in your face. Hell, even your whole body. You look different."

I rolled my eyes. "How do I look different?"

She grabbed my hand, "Because you look happy. Plus, I'm psychic, remember?"

"How can I forget that?" I asked with a laugh.

It's strange, how five years have passed, and I'm still here. I remember being fourteen...so scared of this place. But now, it's my home. I would think of leaving, and then I'd have another attack, another episode. I figured I may as well just stay here, as it suited me better than any other place.

Who would actually want me out there in the real world?

The people who lived in this place were sort of like my family now, especially Alice. She had been my security blanket for so many years and I still remember the day she arrived...

_Four years ago. _

_I had just awoken from another attack, and this time, my headache was not going away. My depression was now starting to affect my everyday activities. I had even thought about killing myself, just to be able to stop from changing, but I could never bring myself to do it._

_It's weird, how the smallest problems can make me change into one of my altars. And the sad part was that I couldn't remember any of the stuff my altars did when they took control of my body. It's like I simply woke up from a nap. _

_I heard the door open but I didn't feel like moving my head to see who was entering. I heard Nurse Hale's voice as she spoke and I heard her husband, Emmett, as he made a comment as well. _

"_Alice, your roommate for the time being is Miss Swan, but everyone calls her Bella. Bella, I know you're awake, say hi to your new roommate," Rosalie said._

_I just turned over on my side, facing the wall. I felt a dip in the bed and fingers running through my hair methodically. It was something Rosalie always did._

"_I know...Bella. Everything's going to be okay," a kind, sweet voice said. I turned my head, finding that it wasn't Rosalie who spoke, and it certainly wasn't she who was soothing me. I saw Alice, for the first time. She had short, black hair and these bright, blue eyes._

I felt Alice's fingers running through my hair again, breaking me out of my daze. We'd been friends ever since the moment we met.

"You know...Rose is expecting again."

My eyes widened as I stared up at Alice. "Are you serious?" I asked.

She nodded her head emphatically. "Yes! I know...so many years of trying, and she's finally pregnant, for real."

I sat up, leaning against the headboard. "You've seen it? The baby...the baby will make it this time?"

"Yes," Alice replied, clasping her hands together and clutching them to her chest. "The baby will make it. I'm so excited for them."

I smiled, as I was happy and excited for them too. It had been hard on them, ever since they'd tried to start a family. Rose had had too many miscarriages to count, and she didn't deserve any of it. All she wanted to do was be a mother, and I knew she'd make a fantastic one at that.

She just couldn't seem to carry out the pregnancies every time she found out she was with child.

But I believed Alice when she said the baby would make it. She'd been right one hundred percent of the time, and I wasn't about to doubt her now.

I couldn't help but smile again, because I couldn't wait to talk to Rose. She and Emmett had been busy lately with a bunch of stuff, including the new house they'd recently purchased. But she always made sure she stopped by after work or during her off hours to chat with me.

_Four months ago._

_I was walking around outside, just enjoying the fall weather before it became too harsh to be without a jacket. While I was walking to my favourite resting spot, I heard soft sobs coming from behind one of the large oak trees. I peered around it and saw Rose resting up against the tree, with her knees to her chest, sobbing her heart out. _

_I didn't say a word, just sat down and pulled her head to my lap, running my fingers through her hair, which she did to me all the time when I was upset. _

_We stayed like that for a while; her crying and me singing a soft lullaby to her. It was one that my mother sang to me when I was younger._

"_I lost it again." _

_She didn't have to tell me, because I already knew. She and her husband Emmett had been trying for over a year to have a baby, but with no luck._

_When the sun was going down, I heard the soft crunching of leaves coming towards us. I looked up and saw a worried Emmett. He just gave me a small smile and took Rose back inside. _

I didn't see Rose for almost three weeks after that happened. But like always, she comes back and she puts on a brave smile, pretending like everything's okay.

All I hope for is that Rose keeps this baby, for her sanity alone, if nothing else.

Emmett's voice broke me out of my trance again, "Bella, get out of bed."

I looked up and shook my head.

"She keeps daydreaming...I wonder who it's about?" Alice said sarcastically, placing one of her fingers on her chin.

I hit her in the head with a pillow, "Hey!" Alice shouted.

I giggled and grabbed my robe from one of the chairs across the room. I wasn't in the mood to deal with my hair so I just put it in a messy bun.

"Later!" Alice shouted, but before leaving, she stopped in front of Emmett and whispered something into his ear.

"Aww," Emmett said and gave me a wink.

My cheeks turned a crimson red. "You suck, Alice!" I shouted, but she was probably at the other end of the hall already.

"So you and…"

I stopped him before he could continue. "Don't even say it or think it."

I pushed my hands against his shoulders and started to walk to the main hall. "So I'm guessing you heard Rose is pregnant again?"

"Yes, how is she doing?" I asked sincerely.

He smiled sadly, "I just don't want her to get her hopes up again. I know the last one killed her...and I still don't think she's over it."

I grabbed his hand and gave him a light squeeze. "Truthfully, I believe this is it."

"Let's hope," he said, more to himself than me.

Smiling, I said, "And if it's a girl, I expect 'Bella' to be somewhere in the name," trying to lighten up the conversation.

Emmett's booming laughter filled up the room. When we entered the main hallway, I saw Edward talking to Alice, but I could tell by his posture that he looked angry.

A/N: What ya think? Love it or hate? Please review I love your feedback! But seriously i have to thank my beta because she is the one that takes my stories to a whole other level. So everyone lets thank AcrossTheSkyInStars!!!!! So everyone check out any of her story and review for her too.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys sorry for the lateness!

Disclaimer: You know the drill. So I don't own the book series.

Thanks again to AcrossTheSkyInStars and to everyone who alerted and review! THANK YOU!

Chapter 2

Edward POV:

"Good to see you, Mr. Cullen, my name's Esme Masen." She got up from her seat behind her desk and walked towards me, proceeding to shake my hand. "Please sit," she indicated to the chair off to my left.

I nodded. Esme walked over to the chair next to me, which kind of shocked me. Usually most therapists sat behind their desks, with a legal pad and a pen ready to fly.

"So, would you rather be called Mr. Cullen or Edward?" Her voice sounded motherly, comforting and sort of soothing. You know…if that makes any sense.

"Edward," I replied quietly.

I started to play with the lower buttons of my pyjama top, trying to calm my nerves.

She smiled. I studied her for a bit and I figured she was probably doing her regular routine, the one she probably did with every patient. She looked like she was in her mid-thirties, almost the same age as Carlisle. She reminded me of those mothers you see on TV, the ones that bake cookies and do the all that goody two-shoes, housewife shit. She's basically the polar opposite of my mother, even on the surface.

"So Edward, I was reviewing you're files that the state sent over and it says you have extreme bipolar disorder, which sometimes causes you to act violently."

She looked up from her notes and put the pile of papers back on the desk, waiting for some reaction.

"Look, Edward, I know you won't open up to me on the first day because you don't know me. You know what, if I were in your shoes, I would do the exact same thing. I believe in trust, and with trust, a person has to earn it. I know it's not given right away."

She gave me a small smile.

"But I expect that after I earn your trust, you will truthfully open up to me. Through that trust we can help you control your anger and your emotions."

I just nodded.

"Besides these one-on-one sessions, you'll also be in our group session we hold daily. There you will hear from others, what they, too, are going through, and how they solve their own problems."

"Is that all then?" I asked.

"If that's what you want, then yes."

I got up and walked towards the door. "Look, I admit it, I have a fucked up life. I only have seven months here, unlike most of these psychos," I pointed to the door, "I'm not your pet project. So if you'll excuse me, I'd rather stare at a wall than talk to you about myself."

Before I left, I heard Esme's voice, "At least you're polite in telling me off Edward, so I take that as a good sign."

Smartass.

I walked past one of the rooms as I headed back to mine and heard sounds of a struggle. I stuck my head through the door and saw Bella, rocking back and forth in the corner. She was crying, shaking, and being held back by the tall, blond-haired guy. The two orderly oafs and Carlisle were huddled around her.

"Bella, you have to say something," Carlisle pleaded.

"Stop hurting me, daddy. I'll be a good girl," she wailed. I moved in a little closer and saw that she was hurting herself with a hairbrush, repeatedly digging it in and smacking it against her thigh. Bruises were surfacing on her skin, marring the flesh as one of the orderlies tried to wrestle the brush from her hands.

"I'm so sorry," she said, rocking methodically and repeating the same thing over and over. Her voice sounded almost child-like compared to her normal voice.

The brush was torn from her hand as she gazed up to me, but she didn't actually see me. It wasn't Bella. She looked through me, repeating her apology constantly to whoever would listen. When her eyes fell back down to her bruised leg, she began beating herself instead, inflicting pain and a long, deep gash.

Blood oozed from her wound, spreading quickly over her soft, porcelain skin. What was once beautifully pale was now sickly red.

"I'm sorry," she repeated again. Carlisle gingerly took a hold of her wrist that was smeared in blood and instructed the other orderlies to help lift Bella up onto her bed. They set her down, attempting to hold her back as she cried and repeated the same thing, again and again.

I could tell that Carlisle cared for Bella much more than a doctor should. He cared for her almost as if she were his daughter with the way he held her hand and tried in vain to talk to her, to calm her down.

I felt sick as I watched her like this, so out of it and destructive. Bella's tears slid down her chin and onto her pillow as Carlisle pulled out a needle, sticking her with some sort of medication. Her cleaned her up and wrapped gauze around her arm and leg, covering up the cuts and bruises. I looked back over to the corner in which Bella had been in and saw the tall blond guy pick up a tiny razor.

That's how she'd cut herself. With a razor.

I shifted my gaze to Bella once again, with blood smattering her clothes, all along her pants and the hem of her shirt. Her brown hair was sticking to her forehead and her big, doe eyes were now lifeless. It was like she literally became a whole other person.

Carlisle looked extremely tired and Emmett sat beside Bella, softly brushing his fingers against the top of her head. She kept mumbling incoherent words and her eyes continually rolled back inside her head.

Before she fell asleep, she looked up, staring at me for what felt like an eternity.

"Edward," she whispered, her eyelids fluttering, "save me."

Then she fell asleep, and everyone in the room looked at me.

Carlisle was the first to speak, breaking the awkward silence, "Jake, please escort Edward back to his room while I finish cleaning up Bella."

Jake just nodded and pointed for me to exit with him. Once we were out of earshot, I had to ask Jake what the fuck was going on back there.

Jake shook his head, not wanting to talk. "I'm just here to escort you back to your room, Cullen."

His voice sounded so robotic.

"Don't give me that bullshit, what the fuck was happening back there with Bella?" I all but yelled.

We came to my room and he escorted me inside. "She relapsed into one of her personalities."

"Oh," was my brilliant reply.

"Cullen, you keep forgetting that Bella is not your average girl. She's has problems...more so than you. I've seen that way you look at her, and the way she looks at you, but that's all it will ever be. She's not some girl you can fuck and then ditch. Just leave her alone for your stay here and we won't have any problems," Jake stated.

He didn't let me reply before leaving my room.

I walked over to my bed and rubbed the back of my neck. The image of Bella huddle in a corner with blood dripping down her arms and legs scared the shit out of me.

What scared me the most was that I didn't want to run away this time. All my life, all I did was run away from my problems, hoping that they would disappear. But something was different. Even though I knew Bella was messed up and wasn't ever going to be one hundred percent, there was something about her that called to me. It was like she was my own personal brand of heroin and I needed to see her to get my fix.

Bella's POV

My head felt like it was about to explode. I looked around and saw that it was no longer day but night. A sudden dull, stinging pain was running up my arm. I looked down and noticed both my wrists were tied up in gauze. I rather felt than saw the bandage that was wrapped around my leg.

_Fuck, I did it again,_ I thought.

What scared me the most was all the attempted suicides. I never remembered anything. I didn't know what I did to hurt myself so badly.

I glanced up to the clock on the wall, noting with tired eyes that it was past two o'clock in the morning.

_Damn, I was out the whole day._

I saw that Alice was asleep; I assumed she had to take some sleeping medication to get her to conk out. She was probably worried sick about me. I cracked my strained neck and tried to find a more comfortable position to fall back to sleep, but nothing seemed to work.

I shifted slightly, gasping as a foreign hand moved to cover my mouth.

"You're finally awake," a deep voice breathed in relief. I jumped slightly as he spoke, but quickly gazed up, locking onto deep, emerald eyes. "It's me," he assured, "Edward."

I blushed because of my late-night visitor, but it didn't matter. My embarrassment was soon masked by a comforting peace that I was craving.

"Don't scream, kay?" he asked. I nodded my head as he removed his hand, disappointed that he was no longer touching me. Edward sat on the end of my bed, looking down to his hands as they rested in his lap. We were quiet for a few minutes but it wasn't awkward, it was nice. The silence was comfortable.

I eventually sat up, feeling that pull towards him. I scooted over to his side, brushing my thigh with his. I would have given anything to be inside his head, to know what he was thinking. I felt his warm touch as his thumb gently caressed my bandages, and I rested my hand on his thigh, shivering when he touched my skin.

"Does it hurt?" he asked.

I shook my head and whispered, "No, just numbing."

He just nodded, his thumb still running over my bandages.

"How are you feeling?" His voice sounded so scared. Why, though?

"I'm okay," I answered. He looked like he wanted to say something else but nothing came out. "What about you, cat got your tongue?"

He looked at me, bewildered.

_You're an idiot,_ I thought.

"I know stupid joke," I muttered to myself. "God, sometimes I have this word vomit and things start coming out that makes no sense. Oh, no now I'm just rambling…"

I closed my eyes, wanting to disappear into some magical black hole. Why was I always so nervous around him?

Before I exploded out of sheer embarrassment, I felt warmth and mint on my lips. My eyes flew open as Edward's mouth covered mine, and I didn't know what to do. It wasn't like I'd ever dated in my life. How could I?

I felt something deep in my belly, something tingly and warm. It was the strangest sensation and I vaguely wondered if _this _is what Alice had been talking about.

And then, before I could register what I was doing, I started kissing Edward back. I had no clue what in the hell I was doing, but I knew it was beyond anything I'd ever felt in my life. His hand ran gently up my arm and figuring that was the 'thing to do' I did the same, following Edward's slow pattern.

His lips were soft like velvet and moist. It wasn't anything too crazy but sweet and gentle. Then I felt him add a little pressure to my arm and a small hissing sound escaped my lips. Then my sudden bliss was taken away.

"Oh fuck, did I hurt you?" he asked in a hushed whisper. "I didn't mean to, I'm so sorry," he panicked. I could feel his weight leave the bed and I stood abruptly, wrapping my arms around his waist and pressing my cheek to his chest.

"No...stop," I pleaded, running my hands up his back. "It's okay. I'm not hurt."

Edward kept rambling about being sorry for hurting me and I rolled my eyes, grabbing his face in my hands and guiding his gaze to mine.

"Edward, look at me," I demanded.

His eyes met mine and they were pained. "I'm so sorry, Bella," he whispered.

I gave him a small kiss on the cheek and smiled at him. "Edward, you could never hurt me."

I wrapped my arms around him and led him back to my bed. His head was resting in my lap while I played with his crazy, untamed hair.

"I was so scared seeing you like that earlier," he whispered. "There was all this blood and you looked so out of it." He pressed his face into my uninjured thigh and kissed my hip bone through my pyjamas. I sighed quietly as I tangled my fingers into his hair, sweeping the unruly mane back and forth in every direction.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Edward, I have no control of my body when I'm like that," I said quietly, "I can't remember what happened."

I think the words did little to comfort him.

I felt him hold on to me tighter. "Please, don't leave me, Bella," he begged softly.

"I promise," was all I could say.

He just nodded and kept repeating that I've promised. We stayed like that for a while before he went back to his room, much to my dismay.

I don't know what happened. I met him two days ago and now I've promised him never to leave him.

The strange thing was that I couldn't help but feel lonely as soon as he left.

* * *

So sorry for the lateness! I really have to thank my Beta reader, AcrossTheSkyInStars, for putting up with me. She's really great at what she does and I'm lucky that she helping me out. Thank you all for you who review and alerted this story it really means a lot seeing that people actually reading my stuff. So please review!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Hey so sorry that it took this long to update. Anyways, I just wanted to thank everyone who reviewed and alerted me for this story. I love looking through my email and seeing all those alerts! I keep on forgetting to put disclaimer on so here it is finally. I'm not an expert in this so I too am learning and doing some research but if anyone wants to help me out with small details I forgot than please tell me. I admit this is fictional but I want my material to be close to reality as possible.

This story has some heavy material in it, like cutting and suicide. Also, they're will be lemons so be warn.

I have to make a shout out to my favourite Beta reader, AcrossTheSkyInStars. She helped me out with all my grammatical errors to make this story beyond better than what I expected.

Ok on with the story…

* * *

Chapter 3

Edward POV

Walking back towards my room, I was both scared and elated. For one thing, I knew I was falling in love with this girl, but the thing that scared me the most was actually going through with my feelings. I never allowed anybody in; it was why I was comfortable with my 'casual relationships' or for a better term 'one night stands.'

Hell, even my parent's didn't know me, because I never let them in.

But this thing that I felt for Bella was something more powerful...beyond my control. The irony of it all, though, was that in seven months, I had no clue where I'd be. I was feeling something for Bella when I was positive a normal relationship between us wouldn't even be possible.

I walked over to my bed and lied down, counting the minutes until I would see her again. It seemed like the whole world was against the idea of the two of us, but I think that's what I loved about it.

---

I was jiggling my leg anxiously, just waiting until we were officially allowed to leave our rooms. The daily routine was soon going to start; pills, morning therapy, group therapy, and a bunch of other bullshit. The silver lining was Bella.

During my first two-week stay here, I met all of Bella's personalities, from Sookie, to the sex kitten-badass, and regrettably...the lost little girl. This one scared me the most.

After a month of being around her and getting to know her, I knew that I was madly in love with her. No matter how lame my day had been and no matter what had happened, she would be there for me. She cared for me and loved me, much to the dislike of the facility. They had already talked to the both of us about patient relationships and how strictly prohibited they were.

Once I heard about that, I flipped out.

"Mr. Cullen, we do have standards here at Forks Greenview," Mr. Benson stated. "You are here to receive the best psychological treatment available, not to be messing around with other patients. I am here to advise you," he took another pause and had this evil smirk on his face, "to keep your dick in your pants and not to fuck that poor girl."

I got up from my seat. "Screw you!" I shouted. "What right do you have in bringing our relationship up?"

Mr. Benson didn't even flinch at my outburst. "Let's be serious here, Mr. Cullen. You meet this girl not even four weeks ago and now your acting like she is worth something to you. Be serious."

I was fucking livid at this point. "She's is worth a lot more than you will ever know," I growled out.

Mr. Benson shook his head, "Yea, okay. Let's look at it from my angle; you find this young, attractive girl and realize it's like shooting fish in a barrel, especially since she's not mentally sane. So you think, inside that drugged up head of yours, that maybe if you act a certain way, she will let you fuck her. Congratulations, it looks like it's working. I know what you're going to do to Bella in the end."

"And what exactly am I going to do to her?" I inquired, resisting the urge to lunge across the desk and punch him in the face.

The asshole took a sip of his coffee and continued, "In your deranged mind, you think you have some sort of feelings, but really, all you want to do is fuck her to pass the time. I personally think it's a bit sick that you would subject yourself to such low standards. I can see it now; you toying with that poor girl's feelings. And soon, when you realize she's getting attached, you will dump her like the rest."

My heart was pumping my blood was boiling. I couldn't think straight; all I could comprehend was the sheer hatred for this fat tub of lard sitting right in front of me.

"You don't know shit," I retorted angrily.

I could hear the door rattling from the outside, "Mr. Cullen, let's not try to kid ourselves. You're an addict, and I know from many years of experiences that you will relapse. You are in no frame of mind to have a stable and lasting relationship, especially with someone who has multiple personalities. And you know it. You can never have a real relationship when you can't even take care of yourself."

I don't remember what came over me, but the next thing I remember was that I was in isolation for two weeks for my little outburst. From what I was told, I clocked that fat fucker in the face, but before I could do some real damage, they had three attendees pull me off him.

It killed me...spending two weeks in isolation. I was literally going mad without seeing Bella. Luckily Emmett was nice enough to allow fifteen minutes alone with her during my stay in isolation.

I had spent one week in isolation. Emmett was really the only source of communication apart from Esme. I was going mad without seeing Bella; I heard from Emmett that Bella had another attack on herself once she found out where I was.

I had been lucky though. I knew Mr. Benson was going to press assault charges on me, but luckily my dad paid him off. I was still on thin ice with everyone at this facility. Even my dosage went up so I could have better control of my emotions. Before, I was taking 300 mg almost four times in a day now it's up to 900 mg of Lithium twice a day. Before I even went on that drug they put me on Haldol, an antipsychotic drug.

I was lying in bed, my eyes closed as I pictured Bella's adorable features in my mind. I imagined the way her lips moved when she smiled or how soft her hair felt against my hands. When I heard the door suddenly open, I didn't even bother opening my eyes. It wasn't until soft lips were on mine that I even stirred.

I looked up from the bed and into Bella's eyes. They were alight with happiness and excitement and I was so happy to see her that I reacted impulsively. I grabbed her eagerly by the hips, pulling her down on top of me. I pressed my lips to hers, holding her close. The kiss wasn't gentle or sweet, but desperate and lustful. I could feel myself growing harder as she shifted on top of me. My body craved hers and I felt on fire with every kiss...every touch.

I think that shocked her because she pulled back all too soon.

"Edward," her sweet, angelic voice panted.

She moved to my side and placed her head near my heart. I wrapped my arms around her petite body.

"Bella," I whispered into her ear.

Her grip grew tighter. "We only have fifteen minutes," she said sadly, her hot breath lingering on my skin. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in. The time I had with her was too short; I couldn't let go of her. It seemed utterly impossible.

"You promised you'd never leave." Man, I was a pussy, but I didn't care. She couldn't leave me.

"I'm here. I won't leave." She kissed my chest.

We stayed quiet for a bit, falling into a comfortable silence.

"How have you been?" I asked.

She shrugged her shoulders, "Okay I guess, just waiting for you to get out."

I started to play with her brown locks. "I heard about your last attack. How are you doing?"

She leaned up on her elbow and stared down at me. She moved my hair from my face, sliding it between her fingers. She had this small smile on her face and it looked as if she was studying every feature. I could tell she didn't want to talk about it, I could see it in her eyes. She moved her fingers over my face, almost like she was remembering every small detail.

"Bella."

She leaned in and started to lightly kiss me. She stopped by my ear, "I don't remember. After I changed back to myself, I couldn't remember anything. But I'm here now...so there's nothing to worry about."

I got up from my position. "Bella, they said you had another razor...and you...fuck, you were aiming for your throat." It sounded harsher when I said it out loud than it did in my head. I couldn't help it. The thought of her trying to kill herself was more than I could handle.

Bella looked stunned at first but then she looked drowsy. She dropped her head and then blinked a few times.

Shit, I thought.

She didn't say a word, but instead grabbed my face and kissed me passionately. I was taken aback at first, but something else took over instead. My hands gripped her by the hips as her lips trailed over my jaw and down my throat. She bit down hard and I groaned quietly.

She grinded on my lap, moving her hands to her shirt. In one swift motion, she tugged it off and then moved back to my lips. As Bella's tongue moved languorously with mine, the only thing I kept thinking was it's not her.

This person, the one taking control, it wasn't Bella. It was B.

Her hands quickly reached around to unclasp her bra and that was about the time I snapped out of my haze. This wasn't my Bella, at all. It might seem weird, but I almost felt like I was cheating on her with her other personality.

"I want you to fuck me so hard my pussy going to be sore for weeks," Bella said as she pulled off her bra.

Then, stupid reality sat in.

I moaned out loud, more out of frustration than lust. "Bella, we have to stop."

She removed her bra and I swear I was about to explode seeing her bare breasts.

"You know how I hate being called Bella, it's B...now stop being a pussy and fuck me sideways."

I closed my eyes and grabbed her shirt and pulling it down over her all too willing body. As much as I wanted to fuck her brains out, I wanted Bella, not B.

B got pissed and jumped off my lap. "You're such a pussy. I don't see why Bella loves you."

What?

"Bella loves me?" I asked hopefully.

B looked at me like I was stupid and rolled her eyes. "Don't play dumb with me. I hear you guys and it makes me sick. I swear these guys in this generation are such pussies."

I got up from my seat and walked over to B, "You can hear my and Bella's conversations?"

B rolled her eyes again and started to play with her hair. "Duh, all three of us can. But I'm the leader of the group; someone had to be the strong one."

I moved closer to B and stopped her from pacing, "So why don't you leave, disappear."

B looked me in the eye and leaned into me, whispering, "Because Bella needs us; she won't survive all by herself."

"Sorry to do this Edward but I have to return Bella." Emmett's voice broke the tension between B and myself.

"Wait, gives us five more minutes," I begged.

Emmett shook his head, "I already gave you that, sorry dude, but I have to take her away."

"But…"

I was cut off by B, "Whatever, come on Emmett. Edward is being such a bitch, I swear I think he has a cunt."

Emmett shook his head again. "I guessing B's back?"

She walked over to Emmett and smacked him on the ass. "Of course." She turned towards me. "Edward, don't look any further into this or I'll have to kick your ass." She gave me one last smirk and walked out the door.

Emmett followed her and left me there all alone, wondering what she had meant with her parting words.

I heard the door cracking open and saw Bella come bursting in. I got up from bed and wrapped her in my arms.

"Morning."

"Morning," she said.

I leaned in and gave her a small peck on the lips.

She grabbed my hand and pulled me out to the front room.

"Why are you in a hurry?" I asked.

She giggled, "Nothing really, just wanted to celebrate your one month stay here."

She brought me to the table, and there sitting on top of it was a chocolate cupcake with strawberry whipped cream.

"You didn't have to do this," I protested.

She picked up the cupcake and pressed the frosting to my lips. She licked off what she'd put on my skin, sliding her tongue over my lips and jaw.

"Edward, Bella...you better stop before one of the other nurses sees you guys and reports you again," Rosalie said.

I moaned into Bella's shoulders, "You're such a cockblock."

Bella moved from my arms and focused her attention on Rosalie's stomach. "How's the baby?" she inquired.

Rosalie let out a small laugh, "Great. I went to the doctors yesterday and so far so good."

Bella squealed and wrapped her arms around Rosalie. I took my cupcake and inhaled it, enjoying the sugary goodness. Bella and Rosalie were rambling on about baby things; shit I didn't really care about. But there was something in Bella's eyes that caught my attention. She looked so happy. Despite all our messed up problems, I knew Bella would be a great mother.

"Now, don't you have a group session today, Edward?" Rosalie asked.

"Yea, I was just leaving."

I walked over to Bella and gave her a short but passionate kiss on the lips, savouring her taste. When I released her from my grasp, I saw the beautiful blush on her cheeks.

I walked over to the group meeting room and took a seat next to Jasper. Jasper and I became good friends despite me almost decking him the first time I met him.

"Hey Edward, how's it going?" he asked.

At first, Jasper was really quiet, and I mean really quiet, but now sometimes he won't shut the hell up. I found out through group sessions that Jasper has emotional issues kind of similar to mine. Some days he's a chatterbox, and other days he's quiet and depressed. Through these sessions, I also found out that Jasper tried to kill himself after his twin brother did. He hasn't gotten over it.

"Pretty good, Bella gave me a cupcake earlier."

Jasper smirked. "You are so in love it's sickening."

"I could say the same thing about you. I see the way you look at Alice. I know she feels the same," I commented

Jasper's eyes grew wide. "Are you serious?"

I nodded my head. "Head over heels, it's kind of sickening."

Jasper looked down at his hands. "I don't think she feels the same way. I mean...why would she want me?"

"Look Jasper, you're a good guy. I know you're the type of person that will take care of Alice and I think that is the one thing she needs more than anything else."

Jasper smiled at me and I could see his mind was going into overdrive.

"Good morning everyone," Esme said, taking her spot in the circle.

The group sessions were still lame but I'd found it kind of relaxing in the end.

In our group we had Jasper, Carl – the depressive, Emily – the bi-polar stripper (don't ask how I know), and Sara – the emotional crier (every five minutes).

"Morning," we all replied.

During my month stay here, I had connected the most with Esme, out of all the staff. She was like the mother I always wanted. She listened to me for countless hours, never judging and was always supportive of my relationship with Bella.

"Okay, so today I wanted to talk about our relationships we have with our parents. Now, I know this is a tough subject but I thought our last session went so well we should really dive in today and examine it more."

I looked around the circle and saw a few of them shifting uncomfortably in their seats.

"Jasper, why don't you start off first? Tells us about your parents and the relationship you have with them."

Jasper bit on his nails nervously. "Well, there isn't too much to say about them. They live in Houston."

"What do they do?" Esme asked.

"My mother...she works as a realtor and my father is a banker."

"And what about your siblings, anything you want to say?" she pushed forward.

I had no clue what Esme was trying to achieve by pushing Jasper into telling us about his brother. I knew she was walking on thin ice. I looked over at Jasper and I could tell he went to a dark place because his eyes looked distant, as if he was reliving an old memory.

"I don't want to talk about it ma'am," he replied, and with that, he was officially done.

Jasper put his head down and continued to bite on his nails. I could tell Esme wanted to continue, but knew not to.

"Edward, what about you?"

I took a deep breath. "Well my father is a CEO at a fortune five hundred company and my mother does nothing."

"What do you mean does nothing?" Esme asked.

I rolled my eyes, "Exactly what I said. She spends money, drinks with her friends, and repeats the same shit every day."

"Any siblings?" she asked.

"Nope, only child," I replied quickly.

I looked around the group and noticed that all eyes were staring at me.

"So what is your relationship with your parents?" she continued.

I laughed to myself, "What relationship? My father was always away on 'business' and my mother is a coked-up, failed model that got pregnant. The closet thing I had to a mother was my nanny as a child."

Esme look deep into my eyes, searching for more information, which when I began studying the tiles on the ceiling.

"And how did that make you feel?"

"Angry," I simply stated.

"Do you think that is why you have such anger issue, to get attention from them and to release some emotions?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "I guess."

Esme looked around the group. "Does anyone have any questions for Edward?"

The group stayed quiet. "Look guys, we need to be more comfortable with each other. The reason why I chose the five of you in this specific group is because of your lack of control you have on your emotions. We are in this together and we should all ask questions and be a part in each other's lives."

"Is that's what lead you to heroin?" Sara asked.

It took me a minute to think about the answer but I knew the truth all along.

"I guess...at first I wanted the attention and then it stopped the pain that never seemed to end."

"What pain?" Jasper asked.

I closed my eyes and counted to ten, something I had done as a child.

"Because I knew that no one loved me and in when I was on heroin I didn't care. God, I sound like a poor little rich child. I mean...despite everything – my fucked up childhood – I'm lucky."

"Why is that Edward?" Esme asked.

"Because I had money to take care of me."

Bella's POV

It's so strange, how one month can change the rest of your life. In one month, I found Edward and fell madly in love with him. Despite all my relapses into my other personalities, he stayed with me. I couldn't wait to see him again; those two weeks that he was in isolation were harder than expected… I even had the scars to remind me. But that's in the past now, all I have to do is go to Esme for my personal therapy session and I'll be with Edward afterwards.

I opened my eyes and came back to the conversation I was having with Alice. I leaned up against the aging sofa's armrest and cracked my stiff neck.

"So when do you think Jasper going to finally ask me out?" Alice asked.

I rested my head against the cushion and replied, "Soon or I'll have to hurt him. I swear you guys flirt more than anyone I know…it's sickening." I gave Alice a wink at the end, which made her laugh even more.

Alice pushed my feet off the seat, "Shut up! Look who's talking. Do I have to remind you about you and Edward? It makes me want to hurl."

I tried giving Alice a pout but failed miserably. I pushed my feet back up onto the couch and started to poke her in the side.

"Stop!" Alice squealed.

She grabbed one of my feet and started to tickle it. I let out a thunderous laughter. "Oh my God, stop!"

I finally managed to get my feet out from under her, when I heard Jasper and Edward come into the room. Both Alice and I shot up from where we were positioned; both of the two boys just shook their heads and tried to hold in their laughter.

"See Edward, this is what we're missing while we're in those group sessions," Jasper pointed out.

Edward chucked, "I know...girl on girl."

Alice and I threw our pillows at the two boys, and to my surprise, they both hit them. I couldn't stop laughing, seeing the expressions on their faces; it was priceless. Edward came running over and grabbed me into his arms, twirling me around.

"Edward, stop before I puke!"

Edward stopped and gently pressed his lips to min. He took my bottom lip between his teeth and nibbled on it. I could vaguely hear Jasper and Alice leaving but couldn't remember for the life of me what they said.

I grabbed hold of Edward's hair and tugged on it, making him hiss loudly. I'd moved my lips down his chin and to his throat before a rude cough interrupted our bliss.

"Mr. Cullen, Miss Swan, do I need to report this?" one of the bitchy nurses asked.

I moved my head down to his shoulder and let out a frustrated sigh. I hadn't had any alone time with Edward in weeks and it was killing me.

Edward released me from his arms and muttered, "Whatever." Edward turned towards me and whispered into my ear, "I'll see you after therapy, okay."

I nodded and kissed him on the cheek. "Kay."

I walked into Esme's office. I was more focused of being with Edward after than on my session. Esme was on the phone when I came in but she waved for me to sit down.

"Okay, I'll make sure to send the report by tomorrow," Esme said over the phone. "Okay, thanks again Fred, bye."

Esme hung up the phone as she took a deep breath and smiled at me.

"Good afternoon Bella, how are you doing today?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "Fine."

Esme nodded. "So I heard earlier that you and Edward were getting a little too close."

I shifted uncomfortably, "I guess."

"Bella, I know what good Edward has done for you and you know that I will always support any decision you make." Esme took a deep breath, "But I don't want you to rush into anything too serious."

"You think were rushing into this?"

Esme moved over to where I was sitting and took the chair to my left. She grabbed my hand and rubbed it softly.

"Bella, you're like a daughter to me. All I'm doing is looking out for your well being."

I could feel my as my breaths were becoming laboured and the room becoming fuzzier. "I-I..." I felt my head pounding...then everything turned off.

"Bella, get back here, you bitch!" my father was yelling from downstairs.

I went underneath my bed and grabbed a hold of my stuffed animal, praying that it would keep me safe. I could hear my mother yelling for her life and the crashing of objects.

I closed my eyes and imagined I was someplace else. That's when I felt the darkness finally taking me over.

I opened my eyes again. I was no longer in Esme's office, but in my room. I looked around and saw that it was no longer daylight, but night.

Shit.

I crashed my head back onto my pillow.

Why can't I be normal?

I ruined another chance to be alone with Edward, again. All I seem to do is wreck everything I'd ever cared for. Maybe I should jus end things with Edward and save him the trouble. I mean, he is going to eventually leave me.

But I had this nagging feeling at the back of my mind to go see him. Maybe we'll have these great six months and after that...who knows? At least I'll have those months to remember for the rest of my life. So I made the decision to allow myself six months of happiness.

I looked over and saw that Alice finally went to sleep. I got up from the bed and walked over to the door. I looked out the window and saw one of the attendees walking into another person's room. I quietly snuck out and made my way across the hall. After sneaking by the nurse's station, I made it to Edward's room.

I opened the door and saw that Edward was asleep. This reminded me of the first time I snuck in here. He looked so peaceful; a part of me wanted to leave so I wouldn't disturb him, but a bigger part of me just wanted to hold him and feel him against me.

So I climbed into his bed and wrapped my arms around him. I placed my head on the back of his shoulder, just enjoying his scent. I moved one of my hands up into his hair and stroked gently. I could feel him stir in his sleep and I stopped before his voice broke the silence.

"Please, don't stop," he mumbled.

I pressed myself into him, placing my lips near his ear, "I thought you were asleep."

He grabbed hold of my free arm and started playing with my hand. He brought it up to his lips and pressed his lips to my palm.

"Thought you were too."

I snuggled up closer to him, while kissing the back of his neck.

"I think my backside's getting more attention than my front," he said in a gravelly voice, thick with sleep.

I let out a small laugh and playfully shoved his shoulder. He turned around so we were face to face.

"Hi," I whispered.

He brought one of his hands up to my face, brushing my long bangs away and tucking them behind my ear. His smooth fingers caressed my cheek and then moved to brush along my bottom lip. I felt this overpowering sensation between my legs and I could see the lust in his eyes.

"Bella, you have no clue how sexy you are right now."

I smiled and leant up, pressing my lips to his. At first it was slow and we were adjusting to the moment, but then I felt his tongue sweep out over my lip. I could feel him growing harder against my inner thighs as we kissed and before long, I needed to take a breath.

I rested my head against the pillow and I opened my eyes to find that Edward was still staring down at me.

He brought me up against his chest, while he leaned up against the bed. I wrapped my arms around him and laid my head against his heart. I could hear it beating rapidly.

"Bella, you're going to be the death of me," he whispered.

I smiled into his shirt and started to trace his muscles through his clothing. A soft hum was escaping my lips as I laid with him.

"Bella?"

"Yea?" I replied absently, returning from whatever world I had been in.

He shifted from our position, only adjusting a little bit. "You were humming and you seem rather distant."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Oh, I guess I do that sometimes."

I felt him kiss the top of my head, "Bella, do you remember anything from earlier?"

I responded with a quiet "no" and adjust myself so my head was in the crock of his neck. He leaned down and kissed my cheek.

"Which one was I this time?" I asked.

He took a deep breath and brought his eyes down to mine. "Sookie," he gave me a small smile.

"Ah," was all I could say.

"Do you know why one of your personalities is a TV show character?"

My Sookie personality was a new one. It's strange, but I always had this personality that was madly in love with another person, mostly from the supernatural genre. I never really got it, but it first started with this book called Juliet and the Vampire. It was a romance novel about a human girl falling in love with a vampire. The character of Juliet stayed with me. She was in me for about a year before I got a hold of a Dead Until Dark and became obsessed with that series.

Juliet turned into Sookie, but the idea of falling madly in love with a vampire just stuck with me. Before I started this whole changing ordeal, I was never that crazy for vampires, but something about those two books really caught my eye.

From what I got from everyone, Sookie was my romantic character, always searching for her one true love that will save her from her boring mundane life. B was my overly sexual and provocative personality. And last...Isabella was my childlike personality, the scared little girl.

"Sookie, she's my newest personality… Oh god how can you be so causal about this? I'm so crazy and messed up. How can you be attracted to me?"

I was so embarrassed talking about this. It wasn't something I was proud of but it was a part of me and I had to accept it. In the back of my mind, I knew Edward could never truly fall in love with a crazy person like me.

Edward lifted one of his hands and brought my chin up so I could look back at him.

"Bella, I don't care about your changing personalities, all I care about is you. If you're crazy, than so am I, but as long as I'm with you, you make me want to be a better person. You're the one thing that's real to me and not fake or wanting something from me. I know it's odd and we've only known each other for over a month, but I can't deny this feeling that's in me. I know this isn't something that I could easily throw away. This is it Bella, you're the one, and I don't care how many personalities you have. As long as I get to keep this Bella then it's okay."

I didn't know I was crying until I felt Edward finger wipe away my falling tears. "Edward, b-but..."

He cut me off with a passionate kiss, his lips taking control of mine. He climbed on top of me but made sure not to press all his weight down on me. He moved his lips harder and faster along with mine, which I gladly didn't mind. After what seemed like hours he pulled back, only pressing his forehead to my own.

"Bella stop doubting yourself. You're everything to me…I love you."

I started to frown because it wasn't rational. "You can't love me...because in six months you're going to leave and find someone else better, someone who's normal."

"Bella, we'll figure out everything at the end of those six months, but let's not think about the future. And it's just you and me; remember that I don't want someone normal because all I want is you."

I pressed my lips together tightly and took a deep breath. "I love you too," I whispered with my eyes closed.

I could hear Edward chuckle and press small kisses all over my face. He moved down to my ears and whispered, "Bella, open your eyes."

I did as he said and realized it wasn't a dream. Maybe something good was really happening. "I'm not going away. You're stuck with me."

I let out a small laugh. "The perfect couple; the bipolar with anger issues and the multi personalities freak."

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A/N: Please review and leave your feedback, it helps me understand what you'll are thinking. Love or hate it. Thanks again for reviewing.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Hey guys so sorry for the late update. Since it's spring break I will hopefully finish up with my next chapter and get my lovely beta reader, AcrossTheSkyInStars, to read it. Thank you all for reading and reviewing and adding me on your alerts. A lot of your reviews really helped me keep going on with the story. So again thank you!!!!!!

Everyone let thank my beta reader who made this flow so much nicer. THANKS!!!!!

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Chapter 4

Alice's POV

Waking up this morning, I found myself looking over at a sleeping Bella. For some odd, strange reason, she looked different. Not in a bad way, just different. Sookie surprised us yesterday by coming out at her weekly therapy session with Esme. Sookie is probably the most tamed personality, especially compared to Isabella. The thing that scares me the most about Bella is that her future is becoming harder for me to see. It's odd, but it's like her mind is constantly changing every minute, and in the last couple of days, everything just went into a fog.

I still remember meeting Bella four years ago and how she changed my life for the better. No one ever believe me that I was physic. Hell, even my sick bastard of a father didn't care. It still makes my skin crawl every time I think about that man and what he constantly took away from me. But being here and having Bella, along with Rose, really changed my life and made me realize that good people still exist in this world.

And then there was Jasper; he came here not even a year ago. He tried to kill himself after the death of his twin brother. We talked about that a lot and we also talked about what happened to me before I came here. A deep friendship formed between us, but I developed stronger feelings for him.

I didn't know if I would ever get out of here. They put me on some medications when I got here but it basically didn't do anything. Technically, I'm cured in their eyes but I knew I still had some demons lurking in me. I just realize how well of an actress I was and how easily I could hide my emotions from everyone…most people are blind.

Mr. Benson talked to me about releasing me within a year from my stay here because of my "quick recovery" but I don't think I'll go through with it. Life in here is just so much easier than the outside world, but really, I don't think I could manage without Bella.

She's practically my sister, and I'm afraid that one day she will actually go through with killing herself when Isabella around. So I have to keep on lying to stay here just to make sure she will be okay.

I moved over to Bella's bed and wrapped my arms around her sleeping figure. I rested my head against her back and just had to remind myself that this fog I'm seeing is nothing more than my imagination acting up and that she won't go through with killing herself.

I could feel Bella stirring in my arms. She looks over almost like she was expecting someone else.

"Alice, I know you love me that way, but I don't see you like that," she said with sleep in her voice.

I smiled to myself. Despite every relapse, she always made sure that I was okay.

"Please, I prefer blonds over brunettes and those of them with penises."

Bella let out a loud laugh and closed her eyes. She must be really tired. She was never this tired after a relapse though.

"A particular penis with the name of Jasper?" Bella quipped.

"Bella, shut up." It became quiet. "Bella, are you okay? You're more tired than usual," I observed.

Bella grabbed a hold of my hand. "Don't worry about me; I was just with Edward most of the night."

Her and Edward's relationship was growing every day. The first time I saw Edward in my vision, I was a little surprised that his type would fall in love with Bella. I looked up his file and saw what she was in for. I was worried that he would take his aggression out on Bella, but then I later found out he had no memory of what he had done; only what he assumed.

I knew he had lots of money because, in all honesty, he should be in jail rotting away for a long time. But with his severe memory loss and a good lawyer, he made it in here for seven months. I watched him around Bella for a couple of weeks, making sure that his anger wouldn't erupt. But with the new medication the facility was giving combined with Bella soothing presence, he became calm and supporting.

I still know what he did and what he is still capable of.

But now Bella always has a smile on her face and she lights up when Edward enters the room. In a strange way, they needed each other.

Even Edward's future is unclear, maybe because he's with Bella all the time and her future is foggy.

"So you and Edward are getting really hot and heavy lately," I said.

Bella turned on her back so she was facing the ceiling. "And your point being?" she asked.

"Nothing really, it's just I noticed you're smile a lot this month."

Bella had a twinkle in her eyes but also a smile on her face. "Because Alice, I never thought a person could ever feel this way. I mean, I love you, but you know in a sisterly way. With Edward, it's different, it's like he's my life now."

I nodded along, I wished I could tell her my true feelings about him but I knew that would lead to a fight and another relapse on her part. So I kept my mouth shut about those two and made sure Bella was happy because that's the most important thing.

"I'm so happy for you Bella; you need this happiness more than any person."

Bella just smiled at my comment, "And so do you Alice." She looked at me, "Jasper will come around soon, and if not soon he's a bigger idiot than I thought."

Jasper and I...our relationship is a bunch of close moments that almost lead to the real thing. It kills me that Jasper doesn't feel the same way about me and that's why I envy Edward and Bella's relationship. They just knew from the start and went for it. Mine, on the other hand, is still in development.

It was nothing but close contact.

"I wish."

Rose came bursting through the door for her morning check-up. She smiled and shook her head. Lately, she always had a smile on her face.

"I swear Alice; you're more in Bella's bed then your own," Rose commented.

Both Bella and I giggled like a bunch of schoolgirls. Rose came over and sat on the chair next to Bella's nightstand. Rose pulled out her daily report and wrote something down.

"So how are you two this morning?" Rose asked.

"Good," I said.

"Better," Bella said.

Rose wrote down our comments and placed the clipboard on the stand.

"Good, so Bella...I heard in our nurse quarters that you and Edward been getting pretty cozy with each other." Rose smirked.

Bella blushed and moaned into her hands. "Does this whole facility know?" she moaned.

"Well sweetie, PDA – especially in the main hall – doesn't go unnoticed."

Bella moaned louder. "So since Edward finally made the move, what about you, Alice, any luck with Jasper yet?"

Even though Rose was a part of the nursing staff she always seemed a part of our group. I mean she was only technically ten years older than us.

"No."

Rose placed a hand on her stomach and rubbed it slightly. She didn't have a baby bump but I could see her a couple months from now huge with twins. I let her have that surprise.

"Do I have to kick this boy in the ass or what?"

"You better or our poor little Alice is going to explode," Bella said.

"Hey, can we not talk about that please?" I whined.

Bella and Rose looked at each other, than at me. "God, why do I have to be the single one?"

Both girls laughed, soon followed by myself. Then all of a sudden, this painful vision hit me and I let out a blood-curdling scream, doubling over in pain.

Edward's POV

I was in the main lobby waiting for Bella to finally get out of her room. A couple of minutes ago I saw Rose go in there so now I know I won't see her for a good twenty minutes. I let out a loud sigh and went back to my book. When Jasper came over and sat down next to me, I placed my book down.

"What's up, Edward?"

"Nothing really, just waiting on Bella to get out," I replied.

Jasper leaned back against the sofa. "Ah, Rose's in there, yea buddy...you'll be out here waiting for a while. Boy do those girls gossip like no other."

"True. So did you finally talk to Alice yet?" I asked.

I was going to kill Jasper if he didn't make a move soon on Alice. I mean she wouldn't wait forever. How many times did I have to tell the dumbass?

"Not yet but soon," Jasper looked down at his hand and started to pick at his nail.

I rolled my eyes, "Well it better be soon or I will…"

All of a sudden, I heard a sick, loud scream coming from down the hall; in the direction of the girls' room. Jasper and I quickly looked at each other and bolted to the source of the noise. My heart was pounding.

_Please don't let it be my sweet Bella._

I didn't know what I'd do without her.

The screams were growing louder and I heard Rose shouting for Carlisle. She ran into their room along with Emmett. Instead of seeing Bella in pain, it was actually Alice. Alice was screaming at the top of her lungs in pain, clutching her head. I could see blood dripping down her nose. Rose and Bella were at her side trying to calm her down but Alice ignored their pleas.

I looked over at Jasper who had gone ghostly pale and into shock. Bella was crying hysterically, while Rose went into nurse mode. Carlisle came running in; he went over to Alice and said a couple things but only her screams filled the room.

Carlisle pulled out a needle and injected her with some sort of medication.

"Emmett, Jake...take her to the hospital ward," Carlisle instructed.

Both Emmett and Jake ran over to Alice, but that's when Jasper snapped out of his stupor and ran to her first.

"Alice, I'm so sorry," he whimpered, lightly stroking her hair, "please don't leave me. I love you. Please don't leave me all alone."

Carlisle moved over to Jasper's side, "Jasper, we will take care of her, you just have to let go of her."

Jasper shook his head, "No, I don't want to leave her. Please Carlisle...take me with you," Jasper begged.

Carlisle just nodded. Emmett came back with a stretcher and both he and Jake lifted her up gently. They left the room, followed by Jasper then Rose and Carlisle.

All that was left was Bella and me. When I looked back down at Bella, she was still in the same position. I bent down to her and wrapped my arms around her. She leaned into my chest, and that's when I heard her release soft sobs against me. I closed my eyes, inhaling her scent. I had no clue what was going through her head but I knew it wasn't anything good.

"Bella," I whispered, "Alice is going to be okay."

She looked up with her big doe eyes and shook her head, "How do you know?"

And the truth was I didn't. I had no clue if Alice was going to be okay but I knew she needed some sort of comfort.

I kissed the top of her head and wrapped my arms even tighter around her body.

Jasper's POV

I felt like everything was déjà vu again. Me in the hospital waiting for someone I love to wake up. Alice looked so small and innocent lying asleep in the hospital wards bed. Her face was pale but I could see color starting to come back. I moved my hand up to her short, brown hair and moved it out off her face. I never realized how soft and smooth her face was.

After my twin brother died, I went into a very dark place, and I didn't think I would survive it. I never fully recovered from it, and every night I closed my eyes, the image of him hanging from our bedroom ceiling would still linger in the back of my mind. I wanted to hate him for taking the easy road out but then I started to hate myself. I blamed myself for his death because I was his twin. I should've known that he was going through some heavy emotional problems.

So a couple of months after his death, I thought it would be easier too to end it all, but I didn't have too much success. My father found me before the pills could bring me to the eternal darkness that I longed for.

After that, they sent me here for recovery and I have been here ever since. I still remember the first time I saw Alice; she was walking with Bella in the courtyard. They were both heading back towards the building, I was staring out the window trying to find the best place to end it all when I saw her stare back at me and smile, and that was it. I was done, she was the girl for me she was the light, the energy I no longer had.

It killed me to think it took me a year to finally admit out loud to her that I'd love her. I just hoped and prayed that she would wake up to tell me she loves me too.

I rested my head against Alice's stomach and allowed myself, for the first time in a very long time, to cry. I just no longer had the strength to keep the tears in anymore. I wrapped my arms around her petite body and allowed my tears to streak down my face, when I felt someone's hand smoothing my hair. I stopped crying, looked up, and saw the most important person in my life looking down at me.

"Hey, don't cry," Alice whispered.

I could tell how weak she was because she could barely lift up her head. I quickly moved to her so now we were facing each other.

"Alice."

Alice brought up her hand and wiped the tears away, I closed my eyes feeling this calming sensation running through my body. "I'm okay, Jasper."

I could feel my bottom lip quiver and tears starting to re-form. It was strange how utterly emotional I had become. "Alice, I thought you left me. Promise me you will never leave me, please," I begged.

Alice closed her eyes and she nodded, "Jasper, I could never leave you. You're stuck with me."

I couldn't have been happier with Alice saying those words but I knew she would be back asleep anytime soon. So I had to make this quick. "I love you Alice, and I can't believe how stupid I was in waiting so long to tell you that. You are my world and it's because of you that I am still alive."

Alice didn't have enough strength to open her eyes but she did smile and I could feel her hand touching my hand lightly. "It's about time you said something," her voice was just barely above a whisper.

I leaned closer into her and pressed my lips on top of hers. I kissed her softly on her cheek when a nurse came in and told me my visiting hours were over.

I whispered into her ear, "I love you."

But before I left, I heard her say the most magical words ever, "I love you too, Jasper."

Bella's POV

Edward and I were lying on my bed just enjoying each other's presence. I moved my fingers and outlined his muscles, which I noticed was becoming a habit of mine. Edward was beyond great; he went out of his way to comfort me. He made me feel special and loved.

"Edward."

He was playing with my hair, twisting it between his fingers.

"Hmm?"

"What was your life like before you came here?"

That was one subject they we never touched upon. It was strange how we became so involved in each other's lives in a matter of weeks but didn't know anything about each other. I mean really know each other.

I could feel him shift, "Nothing special, truthfully."

His voice sounded distant, like he was reading from a script. I looked up at him searching for some truth in his eyes, "Why do you do that?" I asked.

"Do what?" he was now becoming defensive.

"Why won't you talk about your past?"

Edward rolled his eyes and let out a sharp breath, "Look who's talking?" he muttered to himself.

I looked at him strangely. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Edward shook his head in disbelief, "Come on, Bella, I don't know dick about your past or anything and now you're blaming me because I don't want to talk about my life before I got here."

"I was just asking. Edward, I don't know anything about you. Like...what's your favourite color?" I was searching for anything about Edward.

"Red," he said cockily. Now this was starting to tick me off.

"Fine, what is your favourite food?"

"Pasta."

I sighed loudly, "Your favourite movie?"

"Gladiator."

"Are you an only child?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to keep answering my questions with one worded answers?"

Edward rolled his eyes again and I could feel him pull back from me. "Are you serious, Bella? I mean you're asking me my favourite color. How old are we, twelve?"

So this was the Edward that was hiding from me. "I don't even know how old you are?"

Edward rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm 22."

"You know what, I'm done. You're not even trying to get to know me. I know these questions are stupid but these are questions that normal couple know about each other."

"Bella, we're not normal!" he shouted, "We're in a fucking mental facility; we're not at some beach front resort on vacation. You think asking stupid mundane questions will bring us closer together, you're wrong."

I was shutting down. He was yelling. I couldn't take the yelling. I can't handle someone yelling at me. Everything was beginning to get dizzy and distorted.

B's POV

Who the fuck does this motherfucker think he is? He has no right to talk to Bella like that. I got up from him and pushed him off Bella's bed. That asshole made a loud thump on the floor; I hope he gets a big bruise on his ass.

"What the fuck, Bella!" he yelled from the floor.

I looked down at the prick and wanted to laugh at his sorry ass. I knew Bella was too soft and couldn't handle the stress of a relationship but does she ever listen to me, NO. So now here I am, picking up the fucking pieces like a goddamn mother.

"You listen here, you motherfucker, if you EVER come near MY Bella, I will personally kick your ass!" I yelled.

I could tell Edward was taken aback by my comments; good, this prick needs to learn.

"B?"

I rolled my eyes. "No duh, you dumb shit. I swear I don't see what Bella see in you."

Edward got up from the floor, "B, I'm not in the mood for this, bring Bella back."

Who does this motherfucker think he is? I should have sole control over this body but no, in the end, Bella always seems to push me away. Like I'm willing to give up my precious time so he can torture Bella even further…hell no!

"Fuck off."

Edward grabbed my shoulders and shook me lightly. "NOW!"

I smirked at him, hell at this angle he looked pretty fucking hot. I swear I haven't had ass like that in a while. Fucking Bella has to be all virginal and shit. So I did the best thing that came into my mind. I stuck my hand down his pants, searching out what I knew would get his attention. I stroked him quickly, causing him to grow hard and thick in my grasp.

"I know you want to fuck Bella. But you should know that's never going to happen, she has a thing about sex." I paused to slow down my motions, listening as his breaths quickened. "I don't," I whispered into his ear.

I could feel him tensing, his breathing hard and his chest heaving. "B...s-stop," he pleaded.

I scoffed. Like _that _was believable.

I kept my hand moving at a steady pace, "You don't want that. Come on, Edward, this will be our dirty little secret."

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A/N: I know kill me later. I'm almost done with the next chapter so just hold on for a bit. Again I have to really thank my beta read, AcrossTheSkyInStars, who is super busy at the moment but has time for this story. So please review and let me know what you think. Thank you all again for reading.


	5. Chapter 5

A/n: Hey guys, so so sorry for the late update. Really your reviews and alerts make me want to continuing writing this story so keep it up because without them I lose interest.

Disclaimer: This story deals with a lot of heavy material, abuse, cutting, sex, etc. So please be aware of that!

Special thanks to my fabulous beta reader, AcrosTheSkyInStars,! Even though your super busy you still have time to help me out. THANK YOU!

And thank you for reviewing and alerting my story!

Chapter 5

Esme's POV

I felt overwhelmed with the amount of paperwork piling up on my desk. Last week Alice went into what looked like a seizure, but all the tests that Carlisle has done didn't prove anything was wrong with her. Alice was finally released yesterday but now she had to do daily check-ups with Carlisle just in case of another attack. I looked down at my schedule and saw I had Bella coming in at one and Edward at four.

The state was coming down hard on us because of our release rate. They assumed we weren't doing our jobs because our numbers were one of the lowest in the state. But what they didn't understand was that our success rate was one of the top in the nation.

So I had the pressure of that breathing down my neck, along with actually _doing _my job.

Thomas talked to me previously about the early release of some patients, including Alice, but I found that to be unsuitable. I did think the time would come soon when Alice would reach her level here where she could join the outside world, but I could tell _she_ was preventing that from happening. What scared me about Alice is her unwillingness to leave Bella, and probably now Jasper.

Bella was the first to come in. With her relapses into her other personalities these past months, I was wondering if I should up her dosage to help her control her emotions. I knew Bella was not too fond of the medication because of the weird moods swings and the drowsiness, but with the constant threat of Isabella trying to kill herself, I could not risk the possibility of her actually going through with it.

I saw my phone buzzing away and picked it up, "Mrs. Mason speaking."

I could hear soft chuckles in the background and I closed my eyes and shook my head. "You sound so sexy when you say that," Carlisle purred into the phone.

Even after fifteen years of marriage, he could still make me blush, "And to what do I owe the pleasure of this lovely phone call?"

Carlisle's voice hardened in seriousness, "I just wanted to let you know that Alice's results still came out with nothing."

I shut my eyes and felt my head tense-up for another headache. I knew it wasn't anything because something like that does not happen every day. God knows what would happen next with her.

I bit down on my lower lip, "So what are you going to do?"

"Well I'm going to talk to Thomas and figure out something, but you know him. He's so tight with this budget...and especially with the state's new budget cuts."

Great...another thing to worry about. "I'll try and talk to Thomas about her situation," I offered.

"Thanks."

"Good luck sweetie. Hey, sorry to end it early, but Bella should be coming in so I have to go. Love you."

"Love you too."

Right when I placed the phone back down on the charger, Bella came walking through the door.

Earlier this week, she and Edward had had a huge fight – from what she remembers – but lately they looked like they had patched things up. She sat down at her usual chair, and when I got a better look at Bella, I saw that she was exhausted. Her bright, vibrant eyes were dull, with dark, heavy bags beneath them.

"Bella, you're looking more tired than normal, everything okay?" I asked.

She gave me a weak smile and nodded. "It's just...this week's been hard on me. With Alice getting sick and me relapsing a couple times...this week – it's just getting too exhausting."

Bella had always been my favourite patient; I thought of her like she was my own daughter. She had been here for over five years now, and with the tragic death of mother, she had always leaned on me to take that role, which I gladly accepted. I know we were not technically allowed to form those connections, but through my years of working with all different types of people, they tended to trust my mothering roll more so than my physiatrist role.

"Bella, I've been thinking that we should up your dosage until you have better control of your emotions," I suggested.

Bella looked up like she wanted to argue about that but she didn't have the strength to do so.

"Okay," she relented, taking a deep breath, "we can try it, but if it's like the last time, then no. I'd rather have multiply personalities then none."

I nodded and wrote down a note so I could give it to Rose to keep in her file.

"Bella, you know you're like a daughter to me, and you know you can talk to me about anything you want," Bella nodded her head, "but I want to talk about your relationship with Edward at the moment."

"What is there to talk about?" she inquired.

I had to say this delicately, to make sure she didn't get too defensive. "I just wanted to know how your relationship with Edward is going. I mean, this is your first boyfriend...I just wanted to let you know that if you have any questions about anything, you can talk to me."

Bella sat quiet for a moment, "What do you think will happen to us at the end of his seven-month stay here?"

I looked down at my desk and tried to decide what I should tell her. I could lie and say everything was going to be okay, but I think she knew the truth...what was going to happen in the end.

"Do you want the truth or the lie?"

She adjusted in her seat, "Humour me."

"I think, at the end of his seven-month stint here, he's going to leave and maybe he'll keep in contact with you and visit. But...months will go by and the real world will take him away," I said honestly.

I could see her bottom lip trembling before she bit down on it, trying to regain control of her emotions.

"Do you believe in true love?" she asked softly. When I nodded, she continued, "You know, I always envied you and Carlisle. You two seemed like the perfect couple-"

I stopped her before she could go on, "Bella, don't assume that my relationship with Carlisle is perfect. We have our problems. I mean we've been together for over fifteen years; we've had our share of pretty nasty fights. But I knew in the end that he loved me no matter what and I loved him. It takes years to fully understand a person and accept their bad qualities."

"But how do you know that?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "You don't. It's like a gut feeling and it's in your heart. Bella, I don't want you putting all your eggs in one basket. You're eighteen years old and he is your first love."

A single tear fell down Bella's face and she wiped it away quickly. "The thing is," she took a deep breath, "I know it's him and we're both destructive people and maybe he's not entirely healthy for me but he's right. Esme, he saved me. I didn't know how lonely I was before he came into my life."

I nodded my head, not knowing what to say. We stayed quiet for a while until it came to me. "When are you going to tell him, Bella?"

Bella looked up and I knew she knew where I was going. "You mean about my life before here?"

"Bella, any relationship cannot be based on lies. It might work out at first but then the lies become too big and you don't know what's true anymore."

Bella closed her eyes, "What if he doesn't open up? What do I do?"

I walked over to the chair next to Bella and grabbed her hands, "Then you open up to him, Bella. If, for any reason, he does not open up by then, well then you know you were wrong. It's better to break your heart when it's young then when it's older."

Bella's eyes were still closed and I could hear the strain in her voice, "I don't want to get hurt again."

"Bella, that's love. Sometimes you have to experience the pain before you realize what you're feeling is real. That is why some don't allow themselves to fall in love...because sometimes that pain can run too deep."

Bella broke down and pressed her head on top of my hands. I could feel her tears running down and landing on my fingers. "What should I do?"

"That is up to you to decide. You have to make that decision on your own this time, Bella. But I'll always be here for you whether you're in here or out in the real world."

I was still a little bit shaken from Bella's confession earlier. She cried in my arms for a bit before I took her back to her room. Once I laid her down on the bed, she quickly fell asleep. I tucked her in and kissed the top of her head.

When I went back to my office, I felt like I was a zombie. I kept reliving past memories I had of Bella's sessions. The first time I saw here she looked like a broken little girl; she didn't really talk to me for six months, and even then, it was only one-word answers. It took two years for her to tell me about her life.

_Two__ and half years ago_

"_Bella, you been doing very well with your group session lately but I noticed that any time we bring up parents or family, you start to retreat. Can you tell me why?"_

_I knew what really happened, through the police files, but that was only the general story. I wanted to know what was going through her mind._

_Bella looked up scared of my question. _

_I walked over to Bella and sat down in the chair across from her, "Sweetie, he will no longer hurt you. I promise you that on my life." I started to lightly finger her hair. _

"_My dad was an angry drunk," she spoke softly, "my mother would always try to stop him. But one day...I accidentally dropped the plate on the floor. He was angry at me...so mad that was about to beat me. I was..." Bella paused for a second. I could tell she was reliving the memory._

"_Bella, you're doing a wonderful job," I encouraged her. _

"_He was going to beat me but I didn't want to get hurt anymore. So I ran upstairs to get away from him and I could hear my mom trying to stop him. I hid under the bed to try to escape the yelling…and then the screaming stopped." _

_Bella just went quiet. And that's when Isabella came out._

Bella doesn't remember much after that, but I knew the rest from the police reports. Phil killed Renee with a blunt object, and then in his rage, he raped Bella. He thought he had killed her when he smothered her with a pillow, but she managed to stay alive. After that, he went into his bedroom and took his gun out, killing himself. The neighbours reported the sound of a gunshot.

I heard a knock on the door and saw that it was four o'clock. Edward came in and sat in his usual spot.

"How are you doing today, Edward?"

Edward shrugged his shoulders, "Pretty good, you?"

I smiled, "I'm doing okay. Thank you for asking."

He just nodded. The mother in me wanted to comfort him, to tell him what I had discussed with Bella, but I knew that was wrong because of patient confidentiality.

"So what's on the agenda today?"

"Whatever you want, Edward."

Edward thought for a second. "Tell me what Bella's told you?"

"Edward, you know I can't disclose any information."

Edward rolled his eyes, "That's bullshit. She tells you everything, but nothing to me. I'm her fucking boyfriend for Christ's sake."

"Edward, when was the last time you talked to Bella?"

"A couple of hours ago," he retorted, like I was crazy for asking such a question.

I took a deep breath, "No, I mean really talked to her?"

Edward closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I can't."

"Why not, Edward?"

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Because when she knows the real me...I'm – I'm afraid she'll leave me."

"Why do you think that?"

Edward frowned, "Because I would leave me. I'm no saint, hell, I'm the opposite. And Bella...she's like this angel. All I ever do is make mistakes, she doesn't deserve that."

"Edward, Bella cares for you deeply. You need to open up more to her."

"Why?" he asked angrily, his eyes hardening as he tightened his jaw. "Why should I?"

He stood up, pacing behind his chair as he ran his fingers through his hair. "She'll leave when she finds out what I've done, anyway," he muttered quietly.

"What did you do, Edward?"

Edward backed himself into a corner, sliding down the wall. He curled his legs up to his chest, his hands wrapped around his knees, with his head tilted towards the ceiling.

"I had sex with one of her altars," he admitted.

That actually shocked me, out of everything he could've said, that sentence really threw me off.

"Which one, Edward?"

"B," he mumbled into his hand as he covered his mouth.

"What happen after you had sex?"

"I left," he whispered.

I walked over to Edward and kneeled down. "Have you told her yet?" He shook his head. "Why not?"

He looked up and I could see that his eyes were red. "Because she'll leave me like everyone else does."

"Edward, you know keeping this secret will hurt your relationship even more in the end."

Edward crinkled his forehead and slammed his head against the wall. "I'm so fucking stupid!"

I grabbed a hold of Edward shoulders preventing him from hurting himself. "Edward, you have to stop this," I said sternly.

Edward shook his head and wiped away his fresh tears. "I don't deserve her," he mumbled.

"Edward, look at me." When he met my gaze, I reached out, wiping my sleeve across his tear-stained cheeks. "You are a good person, but like us all, you messed up. Now, you can either keep blaming yourself and ruin this relationship, or be grow up and admit your faults."

"What if she leaves me?"

I gave him a weak smile, "I know Bella, and she might be upset, but she will forgive you. Just give her time, but speak the truth."

Edward's POV

Leaving the session, I knew I had to go straight to Bella. The past couple days had been eating me up. Ever since that night with B, I felt like a scumbag for what I had done to Bella. She had already been having a hard week, and now, I'm adding this on top of it. I just knew for sure that she was going to leave me. But Esme was right, she deserved the truth, hell, she deserved someone better than my broken ass.

The walk to Bella's room had to be the longest walk of my life. I kept changing my mind and the thought of Bella leaving me was killing me. She was the light to my very dark life; she made me feel loved, in every way.

I opened the door and saw Bella asleep on her bed. She looked like an angel. I walked over to her and curled myself right next to her. I pulled her closer to me so her body moulded to mine. I inhaled her intoxicating smell and wrapped my arms tightly around her body. I stayed like that until darkness took me over.

The next thing I felt was Bella's lips giving me soft kisses all over my face. I didn't want to open my eyes because that would mean I would have to tell her the truth so I enjoyed the last couple of seconds left in heaven.

I could feel Bella's breath on my ear, "I know you're awake."

"Hmm," I replied sleepily.

Bella's soft giggle made my heart soar. She climbed on top and straddled me, her lips gently on mine. I couldn't help but grab her hips and press her deeper into me. She let out the sexiest groan in the world. She sucked on my bottom lip and dragged her tongue across it. I could feel myself growing tighter in my pants with every kiss and every movement. I opened my mouth and moved my tongue with hers, feeling as heat spread throughout my body. The desire was fogging my clear head.

She pulled back and could I see the lust in her eyes. "I want you so bad," she whimpered, grinding harder onto my dick. She leaned down, sucking my earlobe again as my eyes rolled back in my head.

"Bella, we have to stop," I urged breathlessly. She tugged on my earlobe, causing me to shiver.

She moaned, "Come on, I know you want this."

Bella moved her hand to my strained groin. She rubbed the outside of my pants gently. "God Bella, you're killing me."

Bella giggled, lifting the bottom of my shirt, "Good."

She pulled my shirt off and threw it on the floor. I had to stop this but this sensation was too great. She started to kiss and lick my muscles.

God was she making this harder for me. I was content to let her place affection over my chest and stomach, but when I felt her tug on the hem of my pants, I grabbed her hands before she could pull them down.

Bella looked up, "Edward, I want to do this."

I bit on my lower lip, "Bella, I have to tell you something."

She rolled her eyes and moved up my chest. "Whatever it is, it can wait. I need to feel you right now."

She was about to go back down, but I grabbed her shoulders and stopped her. "Bella, I really need to talk to you," I pleaded with her.

She looked deep into my eyes and could tell something was wrong. She sat up and moved next to me while I sat up.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked.

I grabbed her face and kissed both her cheeks. "God baby, you did nothing wrong. You're perfect."

Bella looked at me questionably. "Then why did you make me stop?"

"I need to talk to you before we push this relationship any further."

Bella nodded. "Okay, what's up?"

"Look, I want to let you in and for you to know everything about me," she smiled softly, "but before I can open up about my past...I need to tell you something that happened earlier this week."

I wished I could read Bella's mind, to know what she was thinking. She grabbed my hand and started to rub it, "Tell me what's going on."

"Bella, I love you so much." I took a deep breath and looked deep into her eyes; I could tell she was frightened.

"Edward, you're kind of freaking me out. You're not breaking up with me, are you?"

I shook my head rapidly, "God no, your everything to me, but I need to tell you something." I took another deep breath. "I don't know how to say this...but remember that I love you."

"Will you just say it, Edward?" she asked apprehensively.

"Okay," I said forcefully, exhaling nervously. "I slept with B," I whispered. Bella was quiet, but the look on her face betrayed the calm she exuded. She was shocked. "Please say something," I begged softly, trying to grip her hand tighter.

When I tightened my grasp, she pulled away. Tears fell down her cheeks, flowing over her precious, brown eyes. I leaned forward to wipe them away, but she pulled back even further.

"Why would you sleep with B and not me?" she asked acidly.

I didn't know what to say, her voice was a mixture of hurt and anger.

"Bella, I-"

She cut me off, "No, seriously, Edward, why? Is there something better about her? Something I don't have?"

"No," I whispered quietly, "nothing."

Bella scowled, crawling off the bed and standing with her arms crossed. Tears still marred her face, but she wasn't sobbing.

"That's bullshit," she growled, "you fucked B, but you won't touch me. So come on...tell me, Edward, what's wrong with me?"

I got up, reaching for her hand, but she pushed my hard against my shoulders.

"Nothing is wrong with you!" I retorted, carding my fingers through my hair. "I don't know how it happened...I don't know what came over me. But I've regretted it ever since it happened, Bella, you have to believe me."

A new wave of tears spilled down her cheeks and she shook her head, "You know what hurts the most?" she asked softly, "What hurts is that you won't even _touch _me like that. Not at all, Edward."

I groaned, dropping to my knees in front of her and wrapping my arms around her waist. I felt the resistance as she tried to push me away, but I held her tight. She gave up after a minute and I watched her as she crossed her arms over her chest again.

"Please, Bella...don't leave me. I can't explain what happened, because it's you...but it's not," I said confusedly. "It's your body...and you're so beautiful...but B – what I had with her was stupid. I don't want to fuck _you, _Bella," I confessed, looking up to her heartbroken face, "I want to make love to you. I love you more than anything. I won't survive without you."

She tore her eyes from mine, "Edward, I need some time to myself."

I shook my head rapidly and pulled her tighter to me. "No, no, no," I begged, feeling as tears prickled the back of my lids, "please don't say that. I promise I will make it up. I'm so s-so sorry." I sobbed into her stomach.

I felt Bella's hand run through my hair. I looked up, not knowing what to expect. She leaned down and kissed the top of my head. "Edward, I just need some time alone."

I nodded solemnly and she bent down so we were facing each other. "Bella, I-"

She interrupted me, putting her fingers to my lips, "I just need some time, Edward. We will talk later."

I nodded again. Part of me wanted to fiercely crush my lips to hers, but I knew that would make her even more upset. Instead, I pulled her into a needy hug.

"Bella, you have to believe that you are my world now. I messed up...so bad, I admit it, but you are the one I love, not your other personalities. It's just...it's hard for me to set that distinction. Only your personality changes, not what I see on the outside. You are perfect, Bella. That's all I see when I look at you. I hope you believe me when I tell you that I love you."

I pulled back and saw that she was still crying. When I wiped the tears from her cheeks, she didn't pull away. I took that as a good sign and leaned in to kiss each one. Then I stood up, bringing her with me and helped her back onto her bed.

I turned to leave, and when I was at the door, I said, "Please...forgive me. I love you."

She didn't say anything. She simply nodded, sinking back down into her bed. I wished I could lie down and hold her in my arms, but I couldn't. I didn't know when I would ever be able to do that again.

A/N: That's is all for now, hoped you liked it. Reviews make me type faster and work harder so please leave a review. Good or bad tell me. I'm not an expert so I do make mistakes, so correct me if I did something wrong. Sorry again for the long wait.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclamier: This story deals with serious situations, like cutting, suicide, etc. It is not suitable for a younger audience. This chapter may not be as heavy compare to my upcoming coming ones but I just wanted to warn you. Thanks for reading.

I don't own Twilight….

A/N: SO SO SORRY for the late update. It sucks because real life was calling and I had to answer. Because of how real life can influences our works unfortunately my favourite Beta will no longer be helping me out. I didn't want to update without the second opinion but it has been months since I last updated and I feel bad. BUT I need your help, if anybody is interested in helping me out with spell check and making sure I make sense PLEASE or knows someone that is willing to put up with this story please PM me! I really don't want to update again without a BETA. Thank you all for your support and getting my lazy ass into gear. Thank you to everyone who added me on their favourites and REVIEWED!

Chapter 6

Bella's POV

I really didn't want to think about last night and what Edward told me. It was so strange that whole situation, I mean he technically didn't cheat on me with myself…wow does that sound crazy. But why did everything have to be so messed up, why couldn't Edward just lie to me so I wouldn't have to be thinking about that all night. At least Alice should be coming back to the room today and I could have her to lean on but I don't want to burden her again with my unhappiness.

I was staring up at the ceiling going over multiple scenarios in my head. One was of me flat out forgiving Edward and us being happy and the other one was taking this as a sign that we're not meant to be together and that we should break up. I heard a light knocking on the door and soon Rose comes walking in. She always looks so radiant. I always wondered what Edward saw in me because soon he'll be out with the normal beautiful people and leave me all behind.

"Hi sweetie, how you holding up this morning?" Rose came over and does her morning routine.

I sat up, "Rose, can I ask you something?"

Rose nods and puts her clipboard down and sits on the side of my bed. "Sure, what's up?"

I looked down at my hands trying to find the best way of saying my question. "Has Emmett every messed up with you?"

I looked up at Rose and she ponders for a moment before speaking, "Of course. I love the man but he sometimes can act like an overgrown child."

I was struggled with the words, "No, I mean really messed up. Almost to the point where you were having doubts? I'm sorry if this is too forward."

Rose shakes her head. "No, we're friends right." She beamed but went back to her thoughts. "When we were first dating he was a heavy drinker but I told him he had to stop for our relationship. So he did but a couple years ago he came home raging drunk and accused me of cheating on him with some random stranger. We got into this big argument when he shoved me against the wall."

I was stunned never would I have thought Emmett would hurt Rose. "Are you serious?"

"Yea, wasn't one of his most greatest moments. So I went up to our bedroom packed my bags and left, I had no place to go so I went into a hotel and stayed there for a couple of days. My cellphone exploded with all his messages, and he found me eventually. Emmett begged for my forgiveness, now normal I would say fuck off but I told him he needed to get sober and get he's life in order. Next day he went to rehab and that was that but we started from scratch again and told if he ever puts his hands on me ever I would chop his dick off."

I was pretty stunned by that story I mean it seemed so far fetch because I always thought they had the perfect relationship.

"Bella, every relationship has problems just some couples are better hiding it then others. So what brought this up?" She asked.

I took a deep breath, "You can't tell anybody."

She crosses her heart, "I promise."

"Edward slept with "B"."

Rose was a little confused at first. "Oh."

"The thing is when he told me I saw it in his eyes that he was sorry and that he loves me but it feels like he cheated on me with a whole other person. God that must sound so stupid."

Rose shook her head, "No it doesn't. Though your situation is unique I can see where you're coming from because "B" is not you."

"I just want to know what to do?" I begged.

"I can't help you there. You have to figure that one out yourself but whatever you choose I will support you."

Rose leaned in and gave me a hug I rested my head on her shoulder. " I love him so much but I'm scared he doesn't love me as much. In a couple of months he's going to leave me for something better. So is it better just to end it now before I really get hurt?"

I could feel tears running down my cheeks. Rose started to play with my hair trying her best to calm me. "Sweetie, you can never know the future but let your heart decide. If you forgive him them do so and if not then let him be but it all up to you."

I pulled back, "Why is being an adult so hard?"

She smiled and pushed my bangs away from eyes and behind my ear. "Because the real world is coming in and you can only hide from it so long."

"You would think being here would prevent that?"

Rose shook her head, "You would think but it catches up to you, even in here."

"I think I'm going to forgive him."

Rose nodded, "But make him grovel, you don't want to seem too easy." I smiled and nodded. "As much as I would love to stay here and chit chat I am forced to go back to work. You'll be okay?"

I nodded. "Thank you for telling me that."

"Bella, as long as you're happy fuck the world."

Once Rose left and I took a shower and got dressed I went out to the main hall. I searched for Alice and Jasper but mostly Edward. I didn't see Edward but I did see Alice and Jasper sitting on the couch. I walked over but the closer I got the more I saw them all over each other. I was about to leave but Alice pulled back from Jasper grasp.

"Bella!" Alice squealed.

She pulled me into this great big hug. I held on her tight just enjoying her presences and thanking my lucking star on how close we were on losing her. I was the first to pull back we both sat down on the couch pushing Jasper off to the side.

"So your all better?"

Alice shrugs her shoulder, "They didn't find anything wrong with me but I feel great, thank you again for visiting me at the hospital ward."

.

"How can I not you're my best friend." I saw from the corner of my eye Alice's hands were in Jasper's. "So did you two finally admit your feelings for one another?"

Alice beamed and Jasper gave me the biggest smile I ever seen from him. "Yep, he finally admitted it." Alice said.

"About time." I said.

"Now, I can't imagine my life without Alice in it." Jasper finally spoke up.

Alice leaned in and kissed Jasper on the cheek, Jasper whispered something into her ear and she let out a small giggle. I felt awkward watching them so I got off the couch and went over to the medical station and got my daily dosage of medication. I looked around and still there was no Edward. I just had to talk to him so I walked over to his room. I was hesitant to knock but knew I had to see him. I knocked softly at first but my calls came unanswered. So I opened the door slightly and noticed that the room was dark and Edward was lying on his bed.

I walked over to him and saw that he was still sleeping. I sat on the bed and moved my hand to his face and lightly touched his features. I could see him starting to wake up and stir. Edward was beyond gorgeous. He's features were sharp and almost looked like he was made from marble. I looked down and at him and had this butterfly feeling in my stomach finally Edward opened his eyes.

"Morning." I whispered.

Edward blinked a couple of times trying to figure out if this was a dream. "Is this a dream?" he voice was raspy.

I shook my head. Edward brought his hands up to his face rubbing it harshly. "No, I'm here."

Then in an instant Edward had his arms wrapped tightly around me and his head was on the crook of my neck. I wrapped my arms around him and rubbed his back up and down.

He kissed my neck and then moved up to my ear, "Thank you Bella, I love you so much. Y-you don't understand how much I love you."

I nodded and felt Edward moving his lips from my ear to my lips. His kisses were light but still my heart ached for them. Soon his lips were on top of mines and I craved it now more than ever. It wasn't sweet and innocent but pure lust and raw emotions. Our lips molded together, while our tongues danced with each other. I wrapped my legs around him with his arm supporting my lower back. I pulled back but soon found myself nibbling on his lower lips and sucking on it. The need of oxygen was taking effect so I took a quick breath and moved down his chin to his neck. Edward moved one of his hands from my back up to my hair.

"I love you so much." Edward kept repeating, while I worked on his neck. "I'm so sorry." Chanting over and over again.

But in the back of my mind I knew I was moving too fast. So I pulled back and both Edward and I looked deep into each other eyes heavy with breath. His hand moved from my hair and cupped my face; I felt his thumb moving alongside my jawbone. He kissed me again lightly and we pressed out forehead together.

"Edward, before we move on with our relationship we have to be open with each other. I want to know everything about you and if you can't do that than I'm out."

Edward nodded. "Anything, as long as I'm with you."

I pulled away from his arms and we both sat alongside each other with our back against the headrest. Edward moved his arms around my shoulder and pulled me over so our legs were twisted together. One hand was rubbing my shoulder, while the other hand was running up and down my thigh. My head was rested on his shoulder and I could feel his chin on top of my head.

"So what do you want to know?" Edward asked.

"Everything." I said quietly.

Edward took a deep breath, "Promise me you won't hold my past against me."

I kissed Edward's heart, "Promise."

"I grew up in a life of privilege, my father works for a major business company and my mother she didn't do too much. My life turned pretty hectic in high school, I guess you would say I hung out with the wrong crowd. I thought they were my friends but they were only using me because of my money. But through them they introduced my to drugs at first it was pot and than it turned into acid, from acid it was cocaine and than in the end it was heroin. Heroin gave me this escape that nothing in the world could give."

I tighten her grip around Edward. I moved her hand up to Edward arms and pushed up his sleeved. Edward didn't resist but I felt stupid for how blind I was, I really don't remember any scaring on his arm. But there it was, it was now healed and the scars were faint but they still were visible. I ran my fingers gently up and down his arm.

Edward kissed the top of my head. "Before I came here I did have anger problems especially with people trying to hurt me."

I looked up, "What do you mean by hurt you?"

Edward looked down and moved my bangs from my face. "People that would only use because of my name and who was my father. My parents, they forgot I even existed but mostly at life and how fucked up it can be. I thought heroin would make life go away but it only hid it for a while. Soon enough my aggression got worse and I would have black outs when I went into these rages. Before I came here I dated this girl name Tanya Harding she was this supermodel who I introduced her into heroin. We were pretty much the Sid and Nancy but for the twenty-first century. We would get into these fights that I had no memory of. The last one was pretty bad because I woke up in jail being charge with a dozen or so crimes and now I'm here."

Wow, so that was it. That was Edward life before he came here; it was like this was a whole different person. All Edward has been to me was nice and gentle but now I can see that he harbour a darker past than I thought but despite everything that he said it didn't change of thing. I can tell all Edward wants is for someone to take care of him and love him for what he is and not who his father is.

"See that wasn't so hard, it still doesn't change that fact that I love you." I said to Edward.

I looked up and I could tell the relief that came over him. "You are an angel."

Angel, yea right. That's another thing I love about Edward, he has this illusion of me that I know is false but he makes me feel beautiful.

"Far from it. So what happen to Tanya?" It was strange saying her name out loud. For the first time I had this feeling of jealous running all throughout my body.

Edward shrugged he's shoulder. "I don't know. I guess she moved on. So what about you, tell me everything."

Great, so now he's going to hear my sob story. I hated people knowing about my childhood before I came here, it's like they felt pity for me. Look, I know it's pretty messed up but still I just want to forget about it and moved on. But Edward deserved the right to know, he told me about himself.

"Well my life wasn't exactly easy. My father Phil was rather abusive to my mother and myself. I remember this one time he burned me with an iron because I didn't fold the laundry correctly."

I felt sick to my stomach; "He was a sick bastard, when I was really little he used to touch me,"

I could feel Edward body grow stiff when I said Phil touched me. His hands formed into fist. I put my hand onto of his, "Edward, it was a long time ago."

"I know but that sick fucker touched my Bella." He struggled to say the words.

"Edward, I need you to relax before I can continue." Edward took a couple of breaths and I could feel him loosen up a little. "So one night I dropped a plate and he was about to beat me but I didn't want to get hurt anymore. So I ran upstairs and hide underneath the bed but downstairs I could hear the yelling from my mother and Phil and then it stopped. After that I don't remember too much the therapist told me because of the traumatic stress I suppressed that memory. I've been here ever since."

Edward was for a loss of words. It was strange how he was taking this harder than me, maybe I grown used to it or maybe I was tired of feeling like the victim.

"What ever happen to that son of a bitch?"

I shrugged my shoulders; "The police told me he killed himself after he killed my mother."

"And that's when the multiple-personalities came out?"

I nodded again. "Yep, Esme said that sometime patient who suffered from my disorder were usually in a highly stressful situation and the only way to deal with it was for them to become a whole other person."

Edward kissed my swollen lips again but it wasn't long before I could add my pressure he pulled back. "I promise you, I will never hurt you EVER."

"Remember that promise." I said.

Edward leaned in but missed my lips and landed for my cheeks. He moved from the side of my cheeks to the lining of my ear. I could feel his husky breath in my ear, "I want to try something can I do that Bella?"

"Yes."

I saw Edward smile, "Close your eyes."

I closed my eyes and felt Edward lips moving down my neck. His hand brought up my shirt exposing my chest. He captured my erected nipple into his mouth and started to suck on it and with the other exposed breast he twisted it making me moan for more. I felt his teeth lightly naw and tug on my nipple. My hands were in his messy locks and I felt myself biting hard on my lower lip.

Edward soon moved down my breast and moved down to my naval, his tongue was licking every part of my skin then going over and kissing every spot. I felt his hand move to my pants bottoms and he pulling them down. Now I know I said I would go slow but this sensation was too good just to let it stop. He dragged my pants and panties off my body and threw them onto the floor. He moved my legs apart and positioned his head between my legs. He started kissing and licking my upper thighs until he reach my core.

I felt his tongue run through my folds and him lightly pulling at something that brought a whole new level to my pleasure. Then I felt his finger enter in me and pump in and out making the pleasure grow. Edward increased his speed with his finger, while his tongue was doing wonders with my folds. He licked the inside of my wall and tugged at every fold. Then I felt this pressure growing at the bottom of my stomach and my back soon arch with pleasure. I couldn't hold it anymore and I moaned loudly Edward's name. The release was like heaven. I was so exhausted after I came off my high.

I felt Edward moved back up to me and wrap his blanket around me. I was too exhausted to even lift up my head.

"You taste so incredible." Edward whispered into my ear.

"No, you were incredible." Was all I could say before I drifted off into the darkness.

Still Bella's POV

Three months later…

"That was incredible." Edward exhaled loudly.

I moved up from his now limped shaft and climbed up his body so we were now facing each other. I wiped the semen from my mouth. Edward arms grabbed my waist and pulled me up so I was now lying next to him. He smoothed over my crazy hair and kissed every exposed skin. I could believe how the months were flying by and how close we were to the end of everything.

Edward then rested his head on my breast and then I heard his soft snores coming from him. I couldn't help but smile and play with his messy locks. Even though three months had passed since we last started doing oral with each other that the furthest Edward would go. It was now starting to get on my last nerve because all I want is to feel Edward completely inside of me. But Edward always had an excuse saying he wanted to wait until we were both on the outside and not stuck in this prison.

I always bit my tongue every time he said that because he doesn't realize that I'm not getting out anytime soon. But I can hold out a little longer… right?

Soon the darkness took over and I feel asleep deep into his arms.

The screaming of some women woke Edward and myself instantly. We both shot up from each other. It didn't help that Edward and I were completely naked. Edward grabbed his pants from the floor and pulled it up, while I hid behind the thin blanket.

"What the hell is going on!" the nurse squealed.

Dammit where's Rose? Usually Rose is there knocking on the door telling us that it was time to separate.

"Mrs. Benson!" the nurse hollered.

"Shit." Edward said to himself.

"You." The nurse pointed at me, "Go to your room and you." She pointed to Edward, "Stay in here until further notice."

I looked at Edward but we both knew we were in trouble. The facility has been pretty lenient on Edward and I relationship but we just had to make sure our PDA was invisible to the public. Since Mr. Reed, put out new rules a couple of days ago we knew we were screwed. Edward and I have been walking on thin ice because our relationship but we didn't care; all we cared about was each other. I just don't want to be taken away from Edward.

The thing that scared me the most at this moment was how screwed Edward and I were at this moment.

A.N : Thank you all for reading! Please review and let me know what you think! REMINDER! If anyone knows a Beta or is and is willing to help PLEASE PM, I hate putting up chapters without a Beta. Thank you all for your support and bugging me for an update!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: So Sorry guys for the delay update. I got a new beta reader, Bell Fraser! She fabulous and is kicking me back into high gear lol Thanks again to everyone that read and gave reviews and added my story on their updates…means a lot. Enjoy!

Chapter 6

Edward's POV

They brought Bella and I into Mr. Reed's office. Bella looked sick as we sat here waiting for Mr. Reed.

"Bella, sweetie everything going to be okay." I tried to make sure my voice was strong enough so she wouldn't hear the fear behind my calm demeanor. Because I knew something bad was going to happen and I would have to be strong for her.

Bella turned towards me, "How do you know, Edward?" I looked down and saw that her legs were constantly shaking. She kept playing with her hair, while her whole body was shaking.

"Baby, you have to calm down. We will never be separated, I promise you that." But in the back of my mind…I knew something bad was going to happen. "I promise," I kept whispering over and over again.

Bella grabbed my hand. "As long as you promise."

"Don't worry about it, Bella."

As the words left my mouth the door opened and the smell of cheap liquor and too much cologne filled the room.

"Mr. Cullen and Miss. Swan, I am shocked to see you here." Mr. Reed sat down behind his desk. "It looks like we have a situation on our hands. So what do we do?"

The fat fucker just stared at us, he knew we were fucked; he was just playing with us. The anticipation was killing me.

"Look Mr. Reeds, I think you should just let me and Bella leave." I stated. I really just wanted to get Bella out of here. I knew with all this stress going on she could easily switch at any moment.

All he did was laugh quietly. I can't believe this asshole just laughed at me.

"No, no, Edward I think you and Bella already know this facility is not some sort of dating network. The only reason why you two are here is to receive the best treatment possible for you both. And we all know that when your minds are somewhere else your treatment gets put on the back burner." He turned towards Bella, "Miss Swan, I am extremely disappointed with you."

"Mr. Reed." But before my angel can speak that asshole interrupted her.

"You know the rules Miss. Swan and I excepted this sort of behavior from Mr. Cullen but not from you. So what do we do?" Mr. Reed looked at the both of us. "As you are aware of, Mr. Cullen, your stay here is only three more months before you're allowed to be released. So within those three months you and Miss Swan will have no contact with one another until your release date."

"What!" I jumped up from my seat. I couldn't be away from Bella she was everything to me. I looked down and saw my angel almost to the brink of tears.

The fucker actually had a smirk on his face. I wanted nothing more than to pummel him. "Now Mr. Cullen, there no need hasty. I'm only looking out for your best interest…you should really be thanking me."

I lost it. I couldn't deal with all these emotions anymore so in a swift motion I was behind his desk and grabbed him by the collar. "You're not taking her away from me, you fat fucker!" I shouted into his face and a sick part of me took satisfaction in seeing the pain expression cross his face.

But before I could deck this fucker I heard Bella's screams break me out of this fog. I looked over to her and saw she was crying hysterical and shouting for me to stop. With all the commotion going on I wasn't shocked to see two attendees busting in. The scene seemed so unreal; my fists were in the air about to deck this fucker, and Bella was crying for me to stop. Then in one swift motion I had the two attendees holding on to me pulling me tight.

"Let go of me!" I kept shouting.

Bella ran up to me. She wrapped her arms around me. I could hear the other attendees calling for backup.

"I love you." She kept repeating.

"Bella, please don't leave me. I love you!" I kept shouting. I didn't give a damn if everybody heard this. I just wanted to rewind and go back a couple hours ago to when I had her in my arms.

Hot tears started to roll down my cheeks and in my anger I couldn't form any legit sentences. Then another attendee came bursting threw the door. I could feel Bella tightening her grip around me. She was begging for them to stop and pleading for someone to let me go.

"Get them out of here! Put that animal…" Mr. Reed pointed to me "…into isolation leave him in there until further notice! Bella and this mongrel will no longer have any more contact with one another!" He shouted.

"No!" Bella shouted.

Suddenly her warm grasp slipped away from my body, the loss of her warm contact was instantly replaced with dread and a cold wave washed over my body. "Bella!" I shouted.

"Edward!" Even in her voice I could hear her trying to struggle away from the fuckers who were trying to separate us.

I felt myself getting pulled out of the room and Bella screams soon filling up the hallway. I heard a loud grunt and soon Bella figure came rushing out of the room. One of the attendee shouted for Emmett. Thank god maybe he can help us out. Emmett came running down the hallway along with Carlisle to see what was going on. Bella soon reached me again, she held me tight.

I felt her place wet tear stained kissing all over my face before connecting with my lips. But before we could fully enjoy ourselves, Emmett pulled Bella away. I looked up and saw Emmett actually holding Bella back from me.

"Emmett, please help us." I pleaded; I would have dropped to my knees if I hadn't been being held back.

Emmett had a pained expression on his face. Bella was struggling to get away from his grasp, while I was being pulled closer and closer to the elevator. Before the doors could shut I saw my sweet Bella collapsing onto the floor.

"Please, let me go back to her." I begged for one of these animals to let me go. They just looked at me like I had suggested we fly to the moon on a tricycle.

I had to go back to her and make sure she was okay. But the elevator took me up to the third floor and further away from my light. I was thrown into isolation but I couldn't stay still. I kept pounding on the door and started to scream at the top of my lungs until my throat turned raw. When I finally realized that I was stuck here I fell down on the floor and cried out every emotion I had left until I finally fell asleep from shear exhaustion.

When I finally awoke I felt like my head was being sawed apart. I got up from the floor and walked over to the bed. I sat on the bed and pulled my head down to my hands. I had no more tears left, just anger that was boiling in my blood. Everything hurt and all I could think about was Bella and how she was dealing with this separation. Lying down on the hard cot I let my mind drift back to some of the good times I had with her.

"Edward, come on." Bella waved over to me.

For the first time in a long time Bella and I were enjoying ourselves outside. Luckily for us this facility had a large amount of land but don't be fooled because once you reached a certain point there's metal gates surrounding this facility. Because the both of us got good behavior we were allowed unsupervised time alone, and thankfully Esme worked her magic and made it so both Bella and I had it together. We only had until sunset but hey I'll take whatever time I could get.

I ran over and caught Bella in my arms. I snuggled into and the fresh smell of strawberries caught my scent. I was in pure heaven; I started to nibble on her neck, while I heard her soft giggles.

"God, I love you." I whispered into her ear.

She held on to me tighter and turned her head so her deep brown eyes were looking at me. "Not as much as I love you."

I shook my head, "That's not possible."

She gave me a small peck on my cheek and released herself from my grasp. She started to run through the mini forest that the grounds had. I chased after her and both of us laughed hysterical. I finally caught up to her and pulled her down to the ground. She rolled on top of me causing us both to become dirty.

"You look so breathtaking." I whispered. I moved my hands up to her face and tried to wipe some of the dirt from her cheek. She turned her head slightly and kissed my fingers.

Her hands moved up to my hair all sensually but then I felt a pile of dirt going running through my hair. She let out a huge laugh and got off of me. I shook my head and got up and chased after her.

"I'm going to get you for that!" I shouted. I heard her laugh echo. I chased after her but soon I lost her. "Bella!" I shouted but all I heard was nothing. I was now getting a little nervous; "Bella!" my voice was shaking a little.

"Boo!" she jumped from behind a tree and grabbed me in her arms, "See I promised, I'll always come back."

I turned around and pulled her into my arms. "Don't ever leave me like that." My voiced filled with such anger that my angel looked shocked.

Bella brought her hand up to my hair and lightly shook the dirt off, "Edward, I was only having some fun. I'm sorry, I won't scare you like that again."

"Good."

I pulled her face towards mines and hungered for her lips to take a hold of mine. I tugged at her bottom lip and jabbed my tongue into her mouth. I wanted her to be all mine. Bella pulled back and took a couple of deep breaths, "Edward."

I shook my head, "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me?" I simply stated. The more time Bella and I shared together the more possessive I seemed to have had become of her. "I love you so much." I emphasized each word.

She finally broke out a smile and made my heart soared. "I love you too."

I couldn't help but smile. It was true though the more time I spent with Bella the more possessive I became of her. The memory of Bella and my first really big fight began because of my possessive ways.

I walked out of my room and made my way towards the main room. I stopped behind the wall when I saw Jasper and Bella sitting on the couch. Bella was laughing about what Jasper said but the thing that made my blood set on fire was Jasper play fighting with my girl. I mean what the fuck was he thinking; he had Alice why was he putting the moves on my girl. I couldn't think straight but the real punch in the gut came when Jasper hugged Bella and then followed up the hug with a kiss to the cheek. I couldn't take it anymore.

I rushed over to them and shoved Jasper off of the couch. "Get your hands off my Bella!" I shouted.

Jasper looked up from the floor, "What the hell are you talking about?"

Fire was blazing in my eyes, "You know what the fuck I'm talking about!"

Bella got up from the couch, "Edward, what the hell are you doing?"

Before I could say anything Rose rushed over to the three of us.

"Hey, before you guys get even further notice you best take this to your room." Her words were venom towards me. "And Edward, I expected you better apologies to Jasper or I'll report this."

Then the realization came over me, and the jealous soon faded away, clearing up my vision. I looked down at Jasper. "Look man, I had no right to do that…I have no clue what came over me."

"It's cool." Jasper nodded and got up.

"I'm sorry."

I looked over and saw Bella was no longer where she was standing. A couple of attendees started to come over but luckily Rose talked them out of it. I help Jasper off the floor and quickly apologize. I ran over to Bella's room. I opened the door and saw her sitting on her bed. I walked over quietly and sat down next to her.

"Bella." I whispered.

But she didn't look over, nor did she move. She just stared blankly at the wall.

"Bella." My voiced begged for her attention.

She blinked a couple of times and turned her head so now she was facing me.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered to her.

I moved my hand over to hers but before I could hold on to it she pulled it back, resting her hand on her lap.

"Please." I emphasized my desperation.

A lone tear fell down her cheek. I reach over and wiped the tear away but not before caressing her delicate porcelain cheek.

"Please say something." My voice broke at the end.

She turned her head, so now we were facing face to face.

"Promise me you won't let your anger take control of you." Her eyes searched mines deeply like she was trying to read my thoughts.

I nodded my head and whispered, "I promise."

Bella nodded her head and went back to staring at the wall. She looked so deep in thought, I was still worried about her but then I felt her soft hand-grasping mine. We both didn't say a word to each other but just enjoyed the presence of each other.

But I kept breaking that promise. Throughout the months we've been together more of my real self started to show. As much as I wanted New Edward to take over, the old one still lingered in the back of my mind. He haunted me and every time I think I get rid of him he's presence soon shows up. Thankfully the medication was working and my mood swings were not becoming too severe.

Alice's POV

I couldn't believe how great life was at the moment. Bella had Edward and I had Jasper, plus Rose is having a baby. But there was something dark lingering in the background that I wasn't too sure about. I kept searching for something but ever since I had that seizure my predications have been a little hazy. The headache started to come back a couple of days ago but I didn't want to worry anybody about them. Maybe that was a sign of things to come.

I looked over and saw Jasper at the other end of the couch. He was reading another history book; my feet were lying on top of his lap. I rested my sore head against the headrest and closed my eyes to help numb the pressure.

Jasper looked up from his book, "Are you okay?"

My eyes were still closed but I didn't want Jasper to worry. I know how protective he could get with me. Our relationship was slowly moving forward and we were now starting to tell each other secrets of our past. I depended on him and vice versa. I was so glad the day he told me about his brothers' suicide and his attempts a few months later.

I look up, "Of course, just a little sleepy."

He gave me a questionable look. "You sleepy? Aren't you always full of energy?"

I roll my eyes and moved closer towards him. "Hey, sometime I do get sleepy. The energizer bunny does run out of batteries eventually."

I reached my hands over and pushed his long blond locks behind his ear. His frown turned into a big fat grin.

It irritated me that I had to keep my relationship with Jasper a secret. But because of the harsh policy between patient relationships we knew it was best to keep it a secret. I knew that they were trying to find any excuse to separate Edward and Bella so there is numerous eyes watching this place. But the small romantic glances and moments of touching made me survive but I knew once Jasper and I were out we would get married. The only thing I was unsure of was when we both were getting out.

"So I was thinking-"

Jasper was cut off by the massive amount of attendees running down to the elevator and some to the staircase. Some of the patients looked up to see what was going on but found nothing interesting and went back to what they were doing.

Jasper looked at me, "Let's go check it out."

Jasper extended his hand to help pull me up. We walked to the staircase; shocked that security didn't catch us both. We descended down the staircase that's when we heard Bella screaming.

Jasper and I ran quickly to the door and pulled it open. There we were met with utter chaos. Bella was screaming for Edward, while Edward was being held back by a couple of attendees.

"Emmett, please help us." Edward begged.

But his cries were unnoticed Emmett grabbed a hold of a struggling Bella. Her screams filled the once quiet hallway. Another attendee grabbed a hold of Edward kicking legs but that didn't achieve much. Edward's cries were raw and filled with pain. I looked back at Bella and my heart went out to her.

"Bella!" I shouted but my cries went unheard. I lost sight of Bella from the swarms of people crowding her.

"Bella!" I shouted again but still I was unsuccessful. I felt Jasper hand grabbing my upper arm.

His hot breath lingering above my ear, "Alice, you have to calm down. We have to leave before they realize we're down here."

I tried to protest but reality soon came in and I knew he was right. I felt myself being pulled away.

Next day...

Bella didn't come back to the room last night. I found myself staring at an untouched bed. I heard the door turned and I quickly placed my head back onto the pillow. I shut my eyes and pretended that I was asleep. The quiet murmurs of Bella and Rose filled the empty silences.

"Bella please lay down you're exhausted." Rose whispered.

Bella protested, "I can't Rose. All I can think about is Edward… all I want is him." She emphasized the last part.

I opened my eyes a little and saw Rose laying down a half asleep Bella.

"I feel so tired but I can't sleep." Bella complained.

Rose was blocking my view of Bella but by her actions I noticed she was tucking Bella in.

"Bella, sweetie everything going to work out."

"No Rose, your wrong this time. Everything's all fucked up." Bella cried.

"Shh, Bella stop worrying too much or your going to cause another episode."

I shifted in my bed trying to get myself a better look but it came unsuccessful.

"I don't care anymore. I'm not normal and I'll never be normal, it's no use pretending. Don't you get it? Doesn't anybody get that? You know Edward is the first person to look past my exterior and treat me like a regular person and love me despite my problems."

Rose moved so I saw a glimpse of Bella shifting in her bed. She had her arm covering her face.

"Bella I—"

But Rose was cut off. "Rose, please let me be."

Rose nodded and got up from her seat. She did one last look back at Bella and left the room. A moment of silence happened before Bella voiced broke the eerie dead pause.

"I know your awake so don't bother in pretending that your not."

I open my eyes wider and saw Bella turned to her side and staring back at me. "Hi."

Bella smiles weakly. "Hi."

"How are you doing?"

Bella closed her eyes and smirked. "Great." Her voice was filled with sarcasm.

"I'm sorry."

Bella closed her eyes and removed her arm that was covering her face. She let out a loud moan, "I'm sorry Alice. I had no right to snap at you."

Bella looked up and gave me an apologetic look. "Bella, it's okay. I can't imagine the stress that you're going through."

"Yea, I wish life was simple."

Bella looked up at the ceiling. "Me too."

I turned my back so I too was looking up at the ceiling, "Do you ever wish that your life was different?" Bella asked.

I ponder for a moment. I never really thought of that before. I mean how simple would it be if I had a normal life, a normal childhood where my father didn't abandon me, and my mother actually loved me.

But I had to shrug it off. If I kept wondering about what life I was supposed to have then I would live my life hating everyone around me. "No."

"Why?"

I let out a deep breath, "Because despite everything that happened in my life and all the struggles I went through, it made me who I am. If I had parents who cared and love me then maybe my life would be different. But then again I wouldn't have met you or jasper, so no; I don't want a different life. Though I would love it if life was easier and everything was like a movie that solved its problems in two hours. But we're here and were stuck so instead of looking at the past I rather look at the future."

"I wish it was though, different I mean. I want to experience pain without leaving my body and becoming someone else. It's strange you know, I feel like I'm a watching a movie when they take over. But the problem is I can't stop it… I don't know how."

I look back over to Bella. She looked utterly exhausted and terrible. Her hair was messy and her skin looked gray. I got up from my bed and walked over. She didn't move she stayed frozen in her spot. I moved over and got underneath the covers, she moved over so I could have room. I wrap my arms around her and felt her chin on the top of my head.

I closed my eyes, "Bella, does it ever hurt?"

Bella shakes her head, "No, not really it's more of a numbing feeling."

I nod.

"Maybe one day we both will get better."

She shakes her head once more. "You see you are the one that's better but your afraid of letting go. Alice, you need to move and get out of here before it's too late."

I look up at Bella, "Too late for what?" I asked.

Bella still looks up at the ceiling, "Before you really make yourself crazy like me."

A/N: Thanks again to my awesome beta reader Bell Frasher! Please review and let me know if you like or hate it! Thanks again for all your support.


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